The 13 Ghosts of Stupid Chris Thorndyke
by Hokuto Uchiha
Summary: While on a trip to Beijing, Chris Thorndyke opens the Chest of Demons and unleashes the 13 most dangerous monsters in the world. Now Sir Idiot and his friends must travel and catch the demons. Parody of The 13 Ghosts of Scooby Doo.
1. Cast List, Intro

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing, except my OC Liesel Beilschmidt. Musical Ninja let me borrow her OC, Myung Ishii. That is all.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 1: Cast List, Intro<strong>

**Cast:**

_**Heroes:**_

(Stupid) Chris Thorndyke (Sonic X)

Sonic the Hedgehog (Sonic X)

Amy Rose (Sonic X)

Miles "Tails" Prower (Sonic X)

Knuckles the Echidna (Sonic X)

Myung Ishii (OC) (Sonic X)

Izaya Orihara (Durarara!)

Shizuo Heiwajima (Durarara!)

Masaomi Kida (Durarara!)

Mikado Ryuugamine (Durarara!)

Anri Sonohara (Durarara!)

Liesel Beilschmidt (OC, LuLu's older sister) (Hetalia)

Ludwig "LuLu" Beilschmidt (LuLu, or Lui, whichever) (Hetalia)

Gilbert Beilschmidt (Gilbo, or Little Prussia, whichever one) (as a little kid, because he acts like one in the anime) (Hetalia)

Soul Eater Evans (Soul Eater)

Maka Albarn (Soul Eater)

Black*Star (Soul Eater)

Tsubaki Nakatsukawa (Soul Eater)

Death the Kid (Soul Eater)

Liz and Patty Thompson (Soul Eater)

Celty Sturlson (Durarara!)

_**Villains:**_

The Noah Clan (D. Gray-man)

13 different spirits (Their names will be a surprise)

* * *

><p>In the middle of a dark room was a table. Sitting on the table was a scary-looking, dark purple chest with a demonic face on it. Lightning struck, and a voice spoke to the readers.<p>

"_This is a warning to all living mortals! For whosoever opens the Chest of Demons shall unleash thirteen of the most terrifying spirits upon the face of the Earth!" _the voice said. Said voice was totally serious about this warning.

However, once the narrator was finished, a twelve-year-old boy by the name of Chris Thorndyke walked over to the chest, curious about what was in it. He reached to touch the chest. His friends ran to stop him, but they were too late; Chris, the stupid idiot that he was, had already opened the chest, causing everyone to fall back screaming. Strange and evil things came out of the chest, ready to attack everyone.

* * *

><p>Everyone ran for their lives as random spirits came at them.<p>

Chris, Sonic (who was dragging Knuckles by his hair), and Tails ran from a big guy with a scary smile and a top hat. Masaomi, Mikado, Anri, Liesel, Ludwig, and Gilbert (who was being carried by LuLu) ran from a guy in a white baboon costume, until Izaya, Celty, and Shizuo came to their rescue. Shizuo then chased Izaya because he didn't like him.

* * *

><p>A group of people with grey skin and stigmata on their foreheads appeared out of nowhere.<p>

"Let's get 'em, guys!" one of the two girls said.

"We're with you, Road!" the twins said. Then they, Road, and the others got run over.

* * *

><p>Chris was making Gilbert hold up a mirror so he could look at himself. Poor Gilbo was straining to hold the mirror because it was a little too heavy for a young child to hold by himself.<p>

"Damn, I look good," said Chris. "A little to the left, boy," he ordered Gilbert like Gilbert was his personal servant.

Myung bonked Chris on the head. "Give me that!" She handed the mirror to Maka.

Maka used her finger to write some numbers on the mirror, and a guy with a skull mask appeared in the mirror. This was Lord Death, who was the one narrating earlier.

Lord Death looked at the group. "Only you can return the demons to the chest. Especially YOU, Sir Idiot." He directed that last part at a now insulted Chris.

"Why us?" Chris asked. He and the others—except for Izaya and Shizuo—were terrified at the spirits.

"Because you let them out," said Lord Death.

"Thanks for nothing," Death the Kid said sarcastically.

"Uh-oh," Izaya said. Everyone looked and saw a group of terrifying monsters gang up on them. Anri gasped at the sight of them. The monsters all laughed as they got closer.

"HEEEEEELLLLLLP!" Chris shouted.

"With my last breath, I curse Chris Thorndyke!" Shizuo yelled.

* * *

><p>Just as the monsters were ready to attack, the whole group managed to stuff a giant black blob (which may have been all the spirits mashed together) back into the chest. Chris slammed the lid shut and sighed in relief. The eyes of the chest glowed and Chris ran away.<p>

"Chicken!" Ludwig shouted. He laughed his ass off and handed the chest over to Miroku Sumimura and Keiko Yukimura, who were the guardians.

* * *

><p><strong>The 13 Ghosts of Stupid Chris Thorndyke<strong>


	2. The Idiot and the Chest, Part I

**Episode 1: The Idiot and the Chest, Part I**

Death the Kid was alone in the house he shared with his father, Lord Death. Two girls named Liz and patty Thompson were in the house with him.

* * *

><p>"Woot, woot!" Liz and Patty exclaimed.<p>

"This is great," Kid said. "11:30, and I've got the place to myself." He took his cell out and called his friend, Soul Eater Evans. "Soul, it's Kid."

"_What's up, Kid?" _Soul asked.

"I've got the place to myself," said Kid. "The old man's gonna be out for a couple hours. Get Maka, and you two round up Tsubaki and Black*Star, and bring them here. We're gonna have fun!"

"_Okay," _Soul said. _"Later."_

"Soul, one more thing," said Kid. "DON'T BRING BLAIR!"

"_Gladly," _Soul said. _"I don't even like her; she's so annoying. Plus, isn't she Roderich Edelstein's girl…one of his girls? Don't ask who Roderich Edelstein is; I heard her mention him once."_

"Maybe," said Kid. "I dunno. Later." he hung up and waited for his friends to show.

* * *

><p>About half an hour later, Soul, Maka, Tsubaki, and Black*Star were at Kid's house. Kid, Liz, Patty, Soul, Maka, Black*Star, and Tsubaki were all sitting in the living room.<p>

"Okay," said Kid. "Get ready for a scary story." He turned the light out, making the room pitch black. Kid began his story:

"Once upon a midnight dreaming, I awoke to a ghostly screaming! So I hurried to my channeling chamber and gazed into my mirror to see what had occurred. And what my eyes had beheld was truly shocking!"

"Kid, why can't you tell the story with the lights on?" Maka interrupted.

Kid face palmed (which Maka and the others didn't see) and sighed. Then he went and turned the light back on. "Okay, big baby. Better?"

"Yes," Maka and the others said.

"Good, now shut up," said Kid. He continued the story:

"The Demon Chest! It was unlocking…Unlocking the Thirteen Ghosts of Stupid Chris Thorndyke!"

"That story sucked!" said Black*Star.

"Got a better one, Black*Star?" Kid said.

"Yeah," said Black*Star. But before he could tell his story, Lord Death came in.

"Oh, crap, it's Dad," said Kid.

"Guys, go back home," said Lord Death. He watched as the kids hurried out of the house, then turned to look at Kid and the Thompson sisters.

"Dad…y-you said you'd be gone a couple hours," said Kid.

"My business ended early," Lord Death said in a stern manner. "Kid, you know you can't have people in the house without my say-so."

"Sorry," Kid mumbled.

"What was that?" Lord Death said, pulling Kid's ear.

"Ow, ow! Sorry!" Kid said childishly.

Lord Death let go of Kid's ear. "Good. Now, get to bed, all three of you."

"Yes, sir," Kid and the girls said and trudged upstairs to their rooms.

Lord Death looked into the mirror. A cold shiver went up his spine. "I've got a bad feeling," he said as he looked at what was in said mirror.

* * *

><p>Meanwhile, in a temple just outside of town, two teenagers were playing cards. One was a black-haired boy with violet eyes. He was nineteen years old and was wearing a black T-shirt, jeans, sneakers, and fingerless gloves. His name was Miroku Sumimura, and he was one of the guardians of the Chest of Demons. The second teen was a fourteen-year-old girl with brown hair and brown eyes. She wore a blue school uniform. Her name was Keiko Yukimura, and she was the second guardian of the Chest of Demons.<p>

Keiko looked at her hand of cards. She put one down, and Miroku picked up the card. Miroku smiled when he saw what he got.

"Gin!" Miroku said as he showed Keiko his hand.

"Aw, man," Keiko groaned. "You always win."

"Better luck next time, Yukimura," said Miroku.

"Ah, shaddup," said Keiko.

"No need to be a sore loser," Miroku remarked.

"Oh, dry up," said Keiko. "And why do you wear those stupid gloves?"

"I like these gloves," said Miroku. "They're cool."

"They look stupid—WHOA!" Keiko said.

Miroku looked to see what shocked her and saw a beastly-looking man named Skin coming right towards her. Both he and Keiko started using their Kekkaishi powers on the guy.

"Give it up already!" Miroku yelled at Skin, who kept on getting up.

"Yeah, the chest is useless to you!" said Keiko. "So, get lost!"

Skin was just about to get to the chest, when Miroku got him by slamming a big kekkai on top of his head. Keiko then slammed one where the sun doesn't shine.

Skin grabbed where Keiko hit him and started crying like a baby. "Could you give a guy a break?"

"GET OUTTA HERE!" Miroku and Keiko shouted, scaring Skin away.

"Friggin' Noah," Keiko said and flipped off a still retreating Skin.

"I can't believe they still try to get past us," said Miroku.

"I know," said Keiko.

Just then, the two Kekkaishi heard a motorcycle. Miroku looked towards the entrance and smiled. "Must be Celty."

As if on cue, a woman wearing a tight, black leather outfit and a yellow motorcycle helmet got off the motorcycle, took out a pager, and started texting. She held it up to the pair, and the two read her message.

"_Shouldn't you guys be heading off to school by now?"_

Keiko slapped herself on the forehead. "Ugh! I can't believe I almost forgot!" She grabbed her backpack and ran. "Thanks, Celty."

"Wait for me, Keiko!" said Miroku. He got his bag and ran off after her. "Watch the Chest while we're gone, okay?"

Celty waved as if to say "Yes", or "No problem". Then she stood her ground to watch over the Chest of Demons in place of the young Kekkaishi. As she was standing there, Celty couldn't help but get a strange feeling, like something bad was going to happen soon.

* * *

><p>Some time later, a group of people with the same skin color as Skin were in their house, doing what they usually do, until they heard the door open and saw Skin enter, still clutching where Keiko hit him earlier. They all freaked out.<p>

"What the heck happened to you, Skin?" Road Kamelot asked.

"I got hit by those Kekkaishi," Skin said through tears. "That mean girl was ruthless! She kicked me in the jewels! I hope she didn't damage me too bad!"

"Yeesh," Tyki said.

"Why do we even bother going after that chest?" Jasdero asked.

"Yeah, why?" David asked.

"Imbeciles!" said the Millennium Earl. "Didn't any of you hear that growling coming from the Chest? The thirteen demons want to be set free!"

"Yeah, Lero!" said Lero.

"But Lord Millennium, they hate us," Lulu Bell told her leader.

"Not to mention, they're the meanest monsters in the world," said Road.

"True, but once we set them free, they'll love us!" said the Millennium Earl. "Why, they'll give us parades, dinners!"

"Wow," all the Noahs said.

"How do you plan to do that, Lord Millennium?" Tyki asked.

"Tyki's got a point," said Wisely. "The Noah Clan is forbidden to open the chest."

"Not to fear," the Millennium Earl replied. "Skin, was the chest glowing red the last time you saw it?"

"Yes, it was," Skin said. "I managed to see that before that Sumimura guy clocked me on the head…and before my jewels were hurt."

"Not in front of my daughter!" Sheril Kamelot, Road's adoptive father, said to the injured Noah. He had his hands over Road's ears.

"What? I said _jewels_, not nu—" Skin said before Lulu Bell covered his mouth.

"Skin. Shut up," said Lulu Bell.

"That's enough!" the Millennium Earl said. "Now, Skin said that he saw the Chest glowing red. That red glow means that living ones are approaching. All we need to do is get _them _to open the Chest."

"Cool plan, Lord Millennium, but what makes you so sure they'll open it?" Road asked.

"Because these particular mortals are among the stupidest on Earth, Lero!" Lero said.

* * *

><p>Just like Lero and the Millennium Earl said, there was a plane flying just above the city they were near. It was very high-tech plane, carrying seven passengers: A blue hedgehog named Sonic, a pink hedgehog named Amy, a red echidna named Knuckles, a yellow, adorable, two-tailed fox named Tails, a twelve-year-old boy named Chris Thorndyke, Chris' grandpa, Chuck Thorndyke, and a twelve-year-old girl named Myung Ishii (1), who was one of Chris' friends. This particular city wasn't their actual destination. Luckily, they were about to find that out.<p>

Tails piloted the plane while everyone else sat back and relaxed. Chris was in the co-pilot seat, trying to navigate.

"Check it out, guys!" Tails said. "Looks like we've reached our destination. Beijing, China."

"Funny," Sonic said after looking out the window. "This doesn't look anything like the pictures you showed us, Myung."

"Huh?" Myung said and looked out the window as well. "Hey! This isn't right!"

"Alright, what's going on here?" Amy asked after seeing the scenery.

Knuckles went up to the cockpit. "Chris, you're the navigator. Where's the map?"

"Right here," said Chris. He handed Knuckles the map.

Knuckles looked at the map. "Chris, would you kindly tell us the course you made us take?" His eyebrow twitched as he fought the urge to strangle Chris the idiot.

"Yes," said Chris. He then told the others the course he had them take, and they all glared daggers at him. "What?"

"Chris, you idiot!" said Knuckles. "We're in Ikebukuro! Look!"

"Ikebukuro, Beijing, what's the difference?" asked Chris.

"A _big _difference," Myung said. "For one thing, Beijing's a Chinese city, and Ikebukuro's a Japanese city. Dummy."

Chris laughed nervously. "Oops."

"I'm gonna 'Oops' _you_, Chris!" Knuckles shouted.

"Hold it, Knuckles," Sonic said, holding Knuckles back. "I know you're mad, but you can't beat Chris up in the plane. We might crash."

"Oh, thank you, Sonic," Chris said with relief.

"If you wanna beat him up, wait till we land," said Sonic.

"What?" Chris exclaimed. "Sonic, how could you?"

"Oh, suck it, Chris Klondike," said Amy.

"That's _Thorndyke_, not _Klondike_," Chris whined.

"Whatever," everyone except Chuck said.

"I'm gonna try and get us back on course," said Tails. "In the meantime, you can all just relax. And Chris doesn't get to navigate."

"Oh, man!" Chris said and pouted.

* * *

><p>Lero laughed. "The idiots are approaching, Lero!"<p>

"Perfect," the Millennium Earl said. "The chest is as good as open!"

"But how are we gonna make them stop here?" Road asked.

"By pulling black magic out of the old hat," said Tyki. He took off his hat and pulled out a bunch of Teaser Butterflies. He sent them after the plane.

The butterflies flew in a swarm up to the plane and took out their fuel. When all the fuel fell out, the plane's first engine began acting strange, until it stopped.

* * *

><p>"What's going on?" Myung asked.<p>

"We lost Engine 1!" said Tails.

"Oh, God!" Chris exclaimed. "We're all gonna dieeeee!"

"Take it easy, Chris," said Sonic. "We've still got Engine 2. We'll get out of this."

As if on cue, Engine 2 stopped, sending the plane downward in a nose dive.

"This is bad," said Chuck.

"Can I panic now?" Chris asked.

"No," said Sonic.

"I'm gonna panic anyway!" said Chris. "Abandon ship! Resident cowards first!" He took a parachute, and Amy took one, too. Chris opened the emergency exit and pulled the string on his parachute, but a giant rubber ducky started inflating! "Oops. Something tells me this is the wrong chute. Uh-oh!" The ducky was getting bigger, pressing against everyone uncomfortably.

"Get this thing out of here!" said Amy. She pushed and pushed until the ducky was out of the plane.

Chris sighed in relief, but the duck pulled him out of the plane, too. He grabbed onto the door and held on for dear life. "Heeeeelp!"

"Knuckles, help Chris!" Sonic commanded. "I'm gonna help Tails with the plane!" He jumped into the cockpit with Tails, while Knuckles rushed and grabbed onto Chris.

"I've got you, idiot!" Knuckles said irritably. He tried pulling Chris in, but ended up falling out. He and Chris screamed as they held onto the plane for their lives. "I'm gonna kill you, Chris Thorndyke!"

"Not now, okay, Knuckles, Myung said as she tried pulling the two in.

Back in the cockpit, Tails and Sonic did their best to land the plane safely. But it wasn't easy.

"Landing gear down, guys," Tails said.

"Check! Here goes nothing," said Sonic.

* * *

><p>Meanwhile, in the city of Ikebukuro, fifteen-year-old Liesel Beilschmidt (2) was standing on a street corner, selling herbal medicine that she made herself (some of the medicines she made had pot as one of the ingredients). "Herbal medicine! Come get your herbal medicine here! Good stuff guaranteed!"<p>

"I'll take five for stress relief," one customer said.

"Okay, five stress meds," Liesel said. She dug out small jars of herbal medicine and gave them to the customer. "That'll be ¥1,564."

"Sure thing," the customer said. He pulled out some Yen bills and handed them to Liesel. "Thank you so much! You're a lifesaver."

"No prob," Liesel said cheerfully as she waved to her customer.

After the customer left, a crowd of people came up to Liesel. One of them, presumably the leader, was pulling Liesel's thirteen-year-old brother, Ludwig, by his ear.

"Ow! That's my ear! I need that for hearing! You're tearing my ear off!" Ludwig yelled. "Lise, get him off me!"

"What's going on?" Liesel asked.

"You're Liesel Beilschmidt, right?" the man pulling Ludwig by the ear asked.

"Uh, yeah…" said Liesel. "Why are you pulling my brother like that?"

"This little punk tried to trick people!" the man complained. He let go of Ludwig's ear.

"Lui, tricking people?" Liesel asked. "Are you nuts? You sure you got the right kid?"

"Yes, we're sure!" another person, a snobby-looking woman said. "This little brat tried to sell me what he said was an antique suit of armor!" She showed Liesel a bunch of beer cans, cooking pots, and a football helmet put together. "Look at this thing! Antique, my ass!"

"Well, if you're not interested in that, perhaps you'll be interested in this tea set from the Romanov Dynasty," Ludwig said. He brought out what seemed to be a badly-painted tea set.

"Like I'm gonna fall for that," the woman said and turned her nose up at the tea set.

"No?" said Ludwig. Liesel face palmed. "How about a golden cat, all the way from Egypt?" He pulled out a badly-painted cat statue that obviously wasn't Egyptian. The teen gulped as he saw that everyone was still glaring at him. Ludwig was about to show the crowd something else, when Liesel pulled him aside.

"Sorry about that, folks," Liesel said.

Liesel and Ludwig's six-year-old brother, Gilbert, came out of an apartment and ran up to his siblings. "What's going on?"

"Our brother pissed off a bunch of people," Liesel replied.

"What?" Gilbert said, looking at an embarrassed Ludwig. "Weeeest! Why'd ya hafta make these people mad?"

"Hey, I didn't mean to!" Ludwig said.

"Lui, what in the world made you think that you could sell that stuff as antiques?" asked Liesel. "They don't even _look _like antiques, _dummkopf_!"

"Can I help it if I'm not a very good artist?" Ludwig said.

"More like _slop artist_," Liesel said sarcastically. Ludwig hid his head in his shirt.

"Aw," one person said about Gilbert, who was holding onto Liesel. "Miss Liesel, are you sure he's not up for adoption?"

"Yes, I'm sure," Liesel said firmly.

"Can I just say one thing, Miss Liesel?" one of the men in the crowd asked. He pointed upward. "Plaaane!"

Liesel, Ludwig, and Gilbert looked up and saw the Sonic gang's plane coming down right toward them and ran for cover. Gilbert didn't get away in time and was caught on the rubber ducky.

"Help me!" Gilbert screamed as the plane sped away with him.

"Gilbo, no!" Liesel and Ludwig yelled. They chased after the plane.

* * *

><p>Inside the plane, Tails and Sonic were trying their hardest to stop. They managed to get the landing gear down, but were still having a hard time getting the plane to stop. It wasn't helping that Chris was screaming his head off outside.<p>

Finally, after much difficulty, the plane finally skidded to a halt. Everyone got off—some of them shaking—and fell to the ground.

"Land!" Amy said in relief. She kissed the ground repeatedly.

Knuckles was strangling Chris. "You idiot! Who told you to inflate that stupid-ass rubber duck?"

"Stop strangling me, Knuckles!" Chris said. "I'm sorry!"

"You can stuff your 'sorries' in a sack!" said Knuckles.

"Uh, guys…" said Sonic. "Look who we just picked up." He pointed to Gilbert, who was shaking so hard that he started crying.

Sonic, Amy, Knuckles, Tails, Chuck, Chris, and Myung all ran over to Gilbert.

"Aw, poor thing," Myung said. She bent down to Gilbert's level, untangled him from the strings of the giant rubber ducky, and tried to calm him down. "Hey, little guy. Are you okay?"

Gilbert covered his eyes and continued crying while shaking his head. "I want Lui and Liesel."

"Who are Lui and Liesel?" Knuckles asked.

"My big brother and sister," Gilbert replied.

"I'm sure they're around here somewhere," said Myung.

As if on cue, Ludwig came running up to Gilbert and the Sonic gang. "Gilbo! Gilbo, my poor little baby brother!" He picked Gilbert up.

"West, I was scared," said Gilbert.

"Aw, I'm sorry," Ludwig said gently.

"Lui, wait up!" Liesel called. She ran up and stopped once she got to her brothers and Sonic and friends. She sighed in relief when she saw that Gilbert wasn't hurt. "Thank God."

"Who are you guys?" Sonic asked.

"I'm Liesel Beilschmidt," Liesel introduced herself. "And these two are my little brothers, Ludwig and Gilbert."

Ludwig got in the Sonic gang's faces. "Alright, what's the big idea, scaring my brother like that?" He glared daggers at them as he kept a protective hold on Gilbert.

"W-We're sorry," said Tails. "We didn't know he got stuck, honest."

"Yeah, it was an accident," said Myung.

"We're not even supposed to be here, you know," Amy added.

"You're not, huh?" a voice said from behind the Beilschmidt siblings. Sonic and the others looked up, while the Beilschmidts turned around and smiled. The voice belonged to none other than Izaya Orihara.

"Iza!" Gilbert exclaimed with a big smile.

"Where'd you come from?" asked Knuckles.

"I was looking for these three," Izaya said, indicating Liesel, Ludwig, and Gilbert. "And I noticed your plane, so I came to see how your faces looked after the crash."

"Okayyy…uh, who are you?" Knuckles asked.

"Izaya Orihara," said Izaya. "Where were you folks heading, anyway?"

"Beijing," Myung replied.

"Uh, isn't Beijing in China?" Izaya asked. "'Cause you're a long way from China."

"Yeah, it is," said Myung.

"But Mr. Genius here got us lost," Knuckles added, pointing at Chris.

"Not a very good navigator, are you?" Izaya asked sarcastically.

"Oh, shut up!" said Chris.

"I can get you to Beijing," said Izaya.

"How can you do that?" Amy asked.

"That's easy. I'll call my travel agent," Izaya said. He took out a cell phone and was just about to dial someone's number, when they heard sirens. "Uh-oh. Sounds like the cops. I'd better go." He ran away, leaving the Beilschmidt siblings and Sonic and company alone with the plane.

"Iza, come back!" Gilbert said.

"Catch ya later, Gilbo!" Izaya called over his shoulder. He kept on running.

A bunch of police cars, fire trucks, and ambulances arrived on the scene.

Sonic looked over at Chris. "Well, this is turning into one _swell _vacation." Of course, he was being sarcastic.

A couple paramedics came up to the group. "We need to take you guys to the hospital to get checked out."

"Okay, we understand," said Chuck. He and the others got into the ambulances. Gilbert was trying to get out of being stuck with a needle.

* * *

><p>After the police, fire trucks, and ambulances left, the Noah Clan was laughing.<p>

"Now all we have to do is get rid of the Dullahan," said the Millennium Earl. "That way, we can drag their plane into the temple, and they'll have to open the chest!"

"Perfect," said Road. "Good thing I got this." She took out a cell phone. This phone belonged to Celty's boyfriend, Shinra Kishitani. Road then texted something and sent it to Celty's pager.

* * *

><p>Celty felt her pager vibrate and took it out. She read the message:<p>

_Hey, Celty,_

_Could you come home right away? I've got a surprise for you._

_Shinra_

Celty shook her head in annoyance, then texted:

_Okay, I'll be right there._

Celty then got on her motorcycle and drove off, leaving the Chest unguarded.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: <strong>(1) Myung Ishii is twelve years old. She has long, black hair, which she keeps tied back with a pink headband. She wears a pink T-shirt with a Hello Kitty face on it, a pair of denim Capri pants, and sneakers. Myung also has dark brown eyes.

(2) Liesel Beilschmidt is fifteen. She has blond hair and blue eyes like Ludwig, only her hair's long. She wears a long-sleeved tee with a picture of a happy bunny on it, denim jeans, and a pair of Skechers sneakers.

**Translation(s):**

_Dummkopf- _Stupid, idiot, dummyhead (German)


	3. The Idiot and the Chest, Part II

**Episode 1: The Idiot and the Chest, Part II**

Chris and the others were at the hospital getting a check up, which was taking some time. He saw something really that he thought was really funny, and he started pointing and laughing. At one point he almost fell on the floor from laughing so hard.

"What's so funny, Chris?" asked Sonic.

"Look," said Chris. He pointed at little Gilbert, who was surrounded by doctors, who were trying to hold him down to take blood from him.

"No!" Gilbert exclaimed. He was starting to get really scared. "Let me go! I want Mommy and Daddy! Mommy! Daddy!"

"Sorry, son, but we need to take some of your blood," one of the doctors said gently. But Gilbert didn't listen and continued crying and calling for his parents.

Sonic glared at Chris. "That's not very funny, you know."

"Yes it is," said Chris. "That puny little kid's crying like a big baby, all because of a needle. What a baby."

"You're heartless," said Tails.

"Mommy, Daddy!" Gilbert yelled as the doctors tried holding him still.

Liesel and Ludwig came in from being examined for any injuries and saw their little brother.

"Come on, Lui," Liesel said. She and Ludwig ran over to Gilbert and the doctors.

"What's going on?" Ludwig asked.

"Are you this boy's family?" asked another doctor.

"Yes," said Liesel. "We're his brother and sister."

"Where are your parents?" asked a nurse.

"They're…not here right now," Liesel replied. She and Ludwig sadly looked at the floor.

"Well, can you hold your brother down?" asked the doctor who spoke to Gilbert earlier. "We need to draw blood."

"Okay," said Ludwig. He and Liesel gently held Gilbert. "Gilbo, you've gotta hold still. Okay?"

"I want Mommy and Daddy," Gilbert said. He still looked upset at having to sit still and let the doctors stick him with a needle.

"Mommy and Daddy aren't here," Liesel said gently. "Come on, please hold still. For me and Lui?"

Gilbert sniffed. "Okay." He held still and squeezed his siblings' hands while the doctor drew a small amount of blood from him. After they were done, the doctors put a band-aid on Gilbert's arm.

"See?" Liesel asked. "Was that so bad?"

"No," Gilbert said quietly, shaking his head.

"Okay, Gilbo, how about we go get ice cream after we're done?" Liesel said in order to cheer Gilbert up.

"Really?" Gilbert asked, perking up at the mention of ice cream. "Can I have chocolate? With chocolate sprinkles and gummy bears?"

"You can have whatever you want, bro," Ludwig replied.

Chris strutted over to the Beilschmidt siblings. "Okay, since you asked, I want squab."

Ludwig punched Chris in the face. "My sister wasn't talking to _you_, dummkopf! And we're getting _ice cream_, not fucking _squab_! Idiot."

Myung giggled at Chris. "Boy, are you corny."

"Oh, shut up, you dumb girl," Chris said.

Myung grabbed Chris by the shirt. "What did you say?"

"Uh…nothing?" said Chris.

"Good," said Myung. She dropped Chris on the floor, making him land on his butt.

"Ow!" Chris whined, groaning in pain.

"I can't wait to get out of here," said Knuckles. "That way we can gas up our plane get the hell out of here."

"Do you have to go so soon?" Gilbert asked the red echidna. He looked at Knuckles with big, adorable eyes.

"Well, Myung is gonna go visit some relatives in Beijing," said Knuckles. He saw that Gilbert kept looking at him. "Oh, come on, kid, don't look at me like that."

"Good news, everyone," Chuck said, like Professor Farnsworth from Futurama. "The doctors say there's nothing wrong with any of us, so we're free to go."

"That's great!" said Amy.

"Come on, let's go gas up our plane," Tails said.

"Well, sorry we have to leave so soon," Sonic said to the Beilschmidts. "But we've gotta get to China."

"We'll help you," said Ludwig. "There's a gas station nearby."

"Great!" Amy said. They all left the hospital and, after Ludwig made a stop at the gas station for some fuel, went to get their plane. However, when they got to the place where they left their plane, it was gone!

"Where'd it go?" Tails asked no one in particular.

"Maybe it's invisible," said Gilbert. "Plane! Are you invisible? Stop being invisible now." He felt around, but felt nothing but the air.

"The plane's not invisible, stupid," said Chris.

"Don't call our little brother stupid!" Liesel yelled at Chris. "He's only six, dammit!"

"So?" said Chris. "He's still stupid."

"Gilbert's not stupid!" Ludwig erupted. "He's more smart, and popular then you'll ever be!"

"There's no way he's smarter than me," said Chris.

"Oh yeah?" Sonic said sarcastically. "What's the capital of France?"

"Uh…is it…um…uh…Be Our Guest?" asked Chris.

"Paris," Gilbert said.

"That's correct," Myung said.

"D'oh!" said Chris.

"Hey, guys, check this out," said Tails. He pointed to some drag marks on the ground. "It looks like our plane was dragged into that temple."

"Why don't you go inside, then?" Izaya asked, once again appearing out of nowhere. Everyone—except Liesel, Ludwig, and Gilbert—screamed.

"You again?" Knuckles said. "What are you trying to do? Give us all heart attacks?"

"Nope," said Izaya. "I just love seeing the reactions on people's faces when I come out of nowhere."

"Weirdo," said Chris.

"Iza, Chris picked on me," said Gilbert.

Izaya glared at Chris. "You did what? Did I just hear Gilbert right? Did I just hear that you picked on a six-year-old child?"

"Uh…maybe," said Chris.

Izaya punched Chris and gave him a black eye, and everyone laughed at Chris' face. After that, they all went up to the temple entrance, unaware that the Noah Clan was inside, waiting for them.

* * *

><p>"Here they come," said Lulu Bell.<p>

"This is too easy, Lero," said Lero.

* * *

><p>Sonic tried opening the doors. "It's locked."<p>

"You're just not pulling hard enough," said Chris. He pushed Sonic out of the way. "Let me try." He pulled really hard on the temple doors in an attempt to get them open. Unfortunately, Sir Idiot pulled a little _too _hard. "Ouch! I think I hurt my hands! Ow, ow, ow!"

"Yeesh, that's gotta hurt," Tails commented.

* * *

><p>"Alright, who locked the doors?" the Millennium Earl asked.<p>

Everyone looked at each other, confused, until Road raised her hand and said, "I did."

Lero got in Road's face. "Road, you little fool! You're not supposed to lock the door; we _want _them to come in here, Lero!"

"Oops," said Road. She looked embarrassed.

"I'll show you 'Oops', Lero!" Lero yelled. He got ready to attack, until Tykki intervened.

"That's enough, Lero," said Tykki.

"Yeah, we're not fighting each other here," Lulu Bell.

* * *

><p>"If you need help getting inside the temple, I know someone who can help," Izaya said. "But the information'll cost ya."<p>

"Oh, come on!" Chris groaned.

"Hey, even I have to make a living," said Izaya.

"Alright, how much do you want?" Chris asked, not really wanting to pay Izaya for information.

"Two hundred dollars," Izaya finally said after a couple minutes of thinking.

"American dollars?" asked Chris.

"Yeah," said Izaya.

"Maybe we should just find a way ourselves," said Chris.

"Here you go," Chuck said. He handed Izaya two hundred dollars.

"What the hell, Grandpa?" Chris exclaimed.

"Look, Chris, it's either we get Izaya's information, or we're all stuck here for who-knows-how-long," Chuck firmly told his pouting grandson.

Chris was about to argue with his grandfather, but knew he was right so he didn't say anything; all he did was pout and cross his arms. Izaya giggled a bit at Chris's face, then decided to tell them his info.

"Alright then, lets go to the city." said Izaya, "The person who can help is there."

"Okay," said Sonic, and with that, they all began to leave.

* * *

><p>Inside the temple, the Noah's groaned in annoyance as they watched the gang leave. They had to get them back, and fast!<p>

"Quick! We have to unlock the door!" yelled Tykki. "If we do that, they'll come back!"

"Okay! I'll go find the keys!" said Road, and then she ran to look for the keys.

* * *

><p>Meanwhile, Celty arrived at her and Shinra's place and parked her bike. She took the elevator up. As she was going up, she wondered what was so important that she had to leave the Chest of Demons unguarded. But, she figured, it was probably okay because it was around this time that Miroku and Keiko were done with school for the day. Then she got off the elevator, went to the door to her and Shinra's apartment, opened the door, and walked inside.<p>

Shinra looked up from whatever he was doing. "Oh, hey, Celty. You're home early."

Celty texted Shinra, _"Okay, Shinra, what was so pressing that I had to stop doing my job guarding the Chest of Demons?"_

"What do you mean?" asked Shinra.

"_You sent me a message saying you had a surprise for me at home," _Celty texted.

"What are you talking about, Celty? I didn't send you a text message," Shinra said. Boy, was he confused.

"_Yeah, right," _Celty texted. _"Then how is it that this came from your phone?" _She showed Shinra the message.

"My phone's been missing all day," said Shinra. "I looked everywhere, but I can't find it."

Celty texted again: _"Okay, now I'm confused…" _Just then, a thought occurred to her. _'Oh, God! The chest!'_

"What's the matter, Celty?" Shinra asked, sensing something was wrong.

Celty texted really fast. _"It was a trick! Someone must've stolen your phone and sent me that message in order to get me away from the chest! I can't believe I fell for that!"_

"Uh-oh," said Shinra. "That's not good."

Celty looked at Shinra. Then she texted again. _"I'm going back to the temple." _She quickly went towards the door.

Shinra got up. "I'm coming with you, Celty."

"_No, it's dangerous," _Celty texted. _"Stay here." _Shinra was about to say something back, but Celty was now already gone and on her way back to the temple.

'_Be careful, Celty. That's all I can say,' _Shinra thought.

* * *

><p>"See you tomorrow, guys," Keiko called to her friends and waved. Then she headed out of her school and ran into Miroku on the way back to the temple. "Hey, Miroku."<p>

"Hi there, Keiko," said Miroku.

"Come on, we're gonna be late," Keiko said. She and Miroku picked up the pace a little.

"Yeah, that Chest of Demons isn't gonna guard itself," Miroku agreed. Just then, he and Keiko saw Celty speed right past them. "What in the world was that?"

"I think that was Celty," Keiko said.

"But I thought she was guarding the chest in our place," said Miroku.

"I thought that, too," said Keiko.

* * *

><p>"I didn't realize you guys were at the hospital so long," said Izaya. "It's about time for all the kids to go home." He noticed a bunch of students coming out of his old high school, Raira Academy. "Oh, and there's someone I recognize." Izaya gestured towards three teenagers, two boys and a girl. Their names were Masaomi Kida, Mikado Ryuugamine, and Anri Sonohara.<p>

Gilbert smiled. "Masaomi, Mikado, Anri!" He ran up to them and put his arms around Mikado.

"Aw, hey there, Gilbo," Mikado said as he patted Gilbert on the head.

"Hey, little awesome guy!" said Masaomi. He picked Gilbert up and ruffled his hair. "Did ya miss us?"

"Yeah," said Gilbert.

"These aren't the ones you were talking about, right?" Chris asked. He rolled his eyes at the three teens babying Gilbert.

"No," said Izaya. "The person I'm talking about hangs out at Russia Sushi. It's not too far from here." He led the group to a sushi restaurant where a dark-skinned guy with a Russian accent was handing out flyers. The man's name was Simon Brezhnev. Mikado, Masaomi, and Anri tagged along with Izaya and the others because they were going to Russia Sushi anyway.

Izaya and the others walked into Russia Sushi. "My mystic friend has a booth in here somewhere."

"Well, we're not gonna bother you anymore, Izaya," Mikado said. "See you later." He, Masaomi, and Anri went to get a booth of their own, while Izaya led the others to a booth in the back of the restaurant.

* * *

><p>While the Sonic group and the Beilschmidt siblings were looking for Izaya's buddy, they were unaware that Tykki was talking to a mysterious woman in the exact same place.<p>

"I need you to put a spell or something on these people." Tykki told the woman, "My family and I need to get that group that just came in to open the Chest of Demons. The only problem is that the guardians might come and try to stop them."

"Let me guess, you want me to do something to the people in this restaurant so they can be used as a distraction." the woman asked.

Tykki nodded and asked, "Can you do that, Medusa?"

"Of course." the woman, Medusa, answered. And then she used some kind of magic on all of the food in the restaurant.

* * *

><p>Unaware of what just happened, Mikado, Masaomi, and Anri ordered some sushi, while Izaya's group stopped at a table.<p>

Izaya stood in front of them and said, "And now, presenting the best of the best, the wonder of the mystic ways, the one and only Lord Death! And with him is his son, Death the Kid!"

Kid glared at Izaya and asked, "Did you have to do that intro?"

Izaya smirked back at him and said, "Yeah."

"What is it now, Izaya?" Lord Death asked, clearly annoyed. "My son and I were just about to eat."

"These folks are in need of assistance," Izaya replied. "Think you can help them out?"

"I'd be happy to," said Lord Death. He put his hands together and when he separated them, a mirror appeared. He looked into it, and it started to glow. Then he spoke. "You're missing an airplane, am I correct?"

"Yeah, that's right," said Amy.

"It's called the X Tornado 300, because it's an upgraded version of the X Tornado," said Tails. "Not because of the movie _300_!"

Chris, seeing that Tails directed that comment at him, said, "Why does he always look at _me _when he says that?"

"'Cause you're the one who assumes that's why he named the plane, you dumbass!" Sonic said.

"Hey, I'm not a dumbass," Chris whined.

Kid cleared his throat. "Hey, do you mind? My father needs to concentrate."

"Oops, sorry," the whole gang said; they were embarrassed.

Gilbert walked up to Kid. "Can I sit on your lap?"

Kid looked awkwardly at Gilbert for a few minutes, then gave in. "Sure. Hop on, kid." Kid couldn't say no to Gilbert, because the boy was just too cute!

"Thanks!" Gilbert said and hopped onto Kid's lap.

"I see your plane," Lord Death said, still looking in the mirror. "It's in the temple. However, you must not go in there!"

"Why not?" Myung asked.

"Because that's where evil spirits dwell," said Lord Death.

Chris got scared. "Evil spirits?" He was hiding behind Myung, the big baby.

Knuckles glared at Chris. "Chris! Move away from there, you imbecile! I never thought you'd stoop that low, you coward! Hiding behind a girl?"

"Have you no sense of chivalry?" Ludwig asked, also glaring at Chris.

"Well, I can't fight," Chris said. He was obviously trying to make an excuse for himself.

"You still don't use a girl as a shield!" Tails yelled.

"Yeah," said Izaya. "You know, I love humans, but I hate _you_. You're probably the only human I hate. Congrats." Izaya, of course, was being sarcastic about the "Congrats" part.

"So…there are evil spirits?" Chris asked again.

"Yeah," said Kid. "Are you deaf or something?"

"No," said Chris.

"Would everyone be quiet, please?" Lord Death asked exasperatedly. "I'm talking."

"Sorry, please continue, sir," Chuck said.

"Alright," said Lord Death. "As I was saying, these spirits are the very same spirits who nearly took over the world many years ago. They're really freaking dangerous!"

"Uh…are you serious?" Chris asked.

"Yes, stupid, I'm serious," said Lord Death.

A few other teenagers and a creepy-looking guy came in just as Chris started another pout fest after Lord Death called him stupid. Lord Death and Kid seemed to recognize them; Izaya and the Beilschmidts did, too.

"Soul, Maka, Liz, Patty, Stein, Black*Star, Tsubaki," said Lord Death. "What are you doing here?"

"Soul was coming here to sample the sushi when we ran into Professor Stein and the Thompson sisters," said Maka.

"Anyway, I just got a message from Crona," said Stein. "Apparently, Medusa put a curse on this place. Anyone who eats the food here will turn into werewolves."

"Werewolves?" Gilbert asked. He looked like he was about to cry, and held on tight to Kid.

Myung laughed. "Ha! That sounds ridiculous."

"Girl, you're talking to a pair of Grim Reapers," said Kid. "And you've got talking animals for friends. If you ask me, this news isn't _that _ridiculous."

"Yeah, weird things happen in Ikebukuro all the time," Liesel said. "I'm serious, it's one weird thing after another."

"I guess that makes sense," said Sonic. Chris was about to make a comment when he heard Maka yell at the top of her lungs.

"SOUL, DON'T EAT THAT!" Maka shouted. "Maka-chop!" She did a karate chop on Soul's head to get the sushi out of his mouth.

"Maka, I was eating that!" said Soul.

"Professor Stein said not to eat the sushi," said Maka. "Weren't you listening?"

"Sorry, the sushi looked so good, I forgot," Soul said.

"You better remember from now on!" Maka said and hit Soul on the head again. Izaya was laughing at this, until he saw Mikado, Masaomi, and Anri about to chow down on some sushi.

"Mikado, Masaomi, Anri, no!" Izaya shouted. He ran over and swiped the sushi away from the trio.

"Hey!" Masaomi said.

"Izaya, we were gonna eat that," said Mikado.

"What did you do that for?" asked Anri.

"Trust me, it's for your own good," Izaya said as he threw the sushi out.

"Aaaaaaawwwww," Mikado, Masaomi, and Anri groaned.

"That was good sushi, Iza-jerk," said Masaomi. "Why did ya throw that out?"

"I said it's for your own good," said Izaya.

"I dunno what he's complaining about," said Black*Star. "This stuff's not too bad." He popped a piece of sushi in his mouth.

"Black*Star, stop eating that!" Maka said. But Black*Star didn't listen and kept on eating.

"Are you sure this sushi's even edible?" Tsubaki asked, picking up a piece of sushi and looking at it with caution, as if it would suddenly mutate and come to life. "It looks questionable to me."

"It's fine, Tsubaki," Black*Star said. He kept on eating, not listening to Maka.

"Don't listen to Black*Star, Tsubaki," Liz said. "This stuff looks…for lack of a better word…um…weird."

"Mind if I have some of that?" Myung asked.

"Go nuts," Tsubaki replied, pushing her plate over to Myung. Myung began to chow down.

"Aah, you like sushi?" Simon asked after he came up to Sonic and friends. Everyone looked up at him.

"Yeah, it's pretty good," said Myung.

"Hi, Simon," Gilbert said and smiled.

"'Sup?" Liesel asked.

"Hey, Mr. Big n' Scary," Ludwig said, only to receive a bonk on the head from Liesel. "Owwwwwwowowowowowow."

"Oh, shut up, it didn't hurt that much, you big baby," said Liesel. Then she rolled her eyes.

Myung was about to eat another piece of sushi, when Knuckles went up to her.

"Are you crazy?" Knuckles yelled in Myung's face. "This Lord death guy said this stuff might turn you into a werewolf! Are you dense, Myung?"

"Will you quit being paranoid? There's no truth to that werewolf stuff," said an annoyed Myung. She took another bite of sushi. Just then, everyone heard a choking sound and turned around, looking for the source. They saw Chris shoving sushi down Sonic's throat.

Sonic spit out the sushi. "Ugh, gross! Chris!"

"What the heck's wrong with you?" Patty asked Chris.

"Yeah, you could've killed him!" Mikado said.

"I just wanted him to try it," Chris said. "And he wouldn't take a bite."

"Hey, check it out," said Amy. "A full moon." She pointed out the window, where a full moon was high in the sky.

Tails looked out the window. "Wow, cool!"

"Uh, guys…" Chris said. He pointed to a guy who was hunched over and kneeling on the floor of the restaurant. "This guy's acting weird."

"Huh?" everyone asked. They looked where Chris was pointing and saw the guy. Then they noticed Sonic acting the same way as the guy, along with Myung and Black*Star. Then the gang looked around to see almost everyone else acting weird.

"Sonic, what's wrong?" Amy asked, going up to Sonic. She jumped back when she saw Sonic's fur turning gray. Sonic was also starting to look more wolf-like. "S-Sonic?" Amy screamed when Sonic turned around and growled at her, baring his teeth.

"Oh my God, Sonic's a werewolf!" Tails exclaimed.

"It looks like almost _everyone's _a werewolf!" said Knuckles.

Mikado looked at Masaomi, who was acting strange. "Masaomi, what's wrong with you?" He and Anri screamed when they saw that Masaomi was turning into a werewolf, too.

"You ate some of that sushi, didn't you?" Izaya exclaimed. He shook Masaomi like a rag doll, until the teen tried to bite him. Izaya got away in time and grabbed Mikado and Anri, then ran away.

"Wait for us, Izaya!" the Beilschmidts yelled. They tried to catch up with Izaya.

"Black*Star!" Tsubaki screamed as she watched her friend transform into a werewolf.

"I think those guys have the right idea," Chris said. "Let's go, Myung!" He got ready to grab Myung, but Chuck yelled at him to get away. Good thing, too, because Myung was already a werewolf! Chris screamed when Myung bit him, possibly out of spite. "Ow! Grandpa, she bit me, she fucking bit me!"

"I guess there's still some Myung in there," Knuckles said, laughing at Chris.

"Oh, shut up," said Chris.

"Guys, come on!" Soul yelled. Everyone followed him while he ran after Izaya, the werewolves in hot pursuit. Tsubaki was crying because of Black*Star being a werewolf.

* * *

><p>Shinra was wandering around, looking for Celty. He saw someone coming his way and screamed his head off when he realized it was a werewolf, and started running for his life. "Celty! Where are you? HEEEEEEEELP!" But Celty didn't come to his rescue; Shizuo Heiwajima did. And Shizuo was pissed off, more than usual.<p>

"Get out of here, idiot!" Shizuo said to Shinra, who kept on running. Then he looked at the werewolves. "If it's one thing I hate more than violence, it's werewolves. And that's not counting Izaya! It's a good thing that asshole's not here. Otherwise, these wolves would be dead!" He picked up a stop sign and threw it right at one of the werewolves.

* * *

><p><em>Meanwhile…<em>

On a street corner, four boys were waiting to cross. There names were Eric Cartman, Kyle Broflovski, Stan Marsh, and Kenny McCormick. They had just come out of the movie theater.

"That movie was so dumb," said Cartman. "Why do they have so many weird names?"

"We're in Japan, fatass," said Kyle.

"Hey! Don't call me fat, you damn Jew!" Cartman yelled. Kyle hit Cartman on the arm, but not hard at all. Cartman then started crying and whining.

"Cartman, stop being a baby," Stan said and rolled his eyes.

"Yeah," Kenny said, but nobody could understand him.

"Oh my God! Werewolves!" Stan shouted. He pointed to the oncoming mob of werewolves. Cartman, Kyle, and Kenny looked, then screamed and ran without even looking at the signal on the street light. One of the werewolves grabbed Kenny and tore his head off!

"Oh my God! You killed Kenny," said Stan.

"You bastards!" Kyle finished. Cartman just stared with his mouth open.

* * *

><p><em>Back to the story…<em>

Izaya and the others kept on running from the werewolves. The werewolves were just about to close in on the gang, when a blue wall appeared in front of them and stopped the wolves.

"Get back!" Miroku shouted at the wolves. "Go away, shoo!"

"I'll get this one!" said Keiko. She got one of the wolves in her barrier and was about to destroy it when Tails stopped her.

"Wait, don't! That's a person!" Tails told the girl.

"Huh?" Keiko asked. "Wait…all these werewolves used to be humans?"

"Duh," said Chris. "Why else would they be wearing clothes, stupid girl?"

"Ketsu!" Keiko said and hit Chris with another kekkai. Chris was whining in pain, and Keiko glared at him. "That's for calling me stupid."

"Got any herbal medicine for head injuries?" Chris asked Liesel.

"Yeah, but I dunno if I should give it to _you_," said Liesel.

Izaya remembered something, then turned to Liesel. "Hey, don't you have a few poison antidotes?"

"Yeah," Liesel replied. She pulled a few small jars out of her backpack.

"Good," said Izaya. "Now I'm gonna need some water." Miroku gave him some bottled water he had on him. Izaya poured the contents of the medicine container into the bottle, recapped the water, and shook well.

"What are you up to?" Anri asked.

"You'll see," Izaya said with his usual smirk. As if on cue, Myung came charging at them, with Masaomi at her side, and Sonic and Black*Star right behind. "Good timing. Take this!" Izaya opened the bottle, and the stuff splashed right onto Myung, Black*Star, Masaomi, and Sonic, turning them back to normal.

"Wha—?" Sonic said. "Hey, I'm a hedgehog again!" Then he was glomped by Amy, who kept on saying Sonic's name over and over, and crying.

"Sonic, Sonic, Sonic, I was so worrieeeeeeed!" Amy exclaimed.

"Amy, get off!" said Sonic. He tried pushing Amy off him, but she was hanging on tight.

Chris hugged Myung. "Thank goodness you're alright."

Myung pushed Chris off her. "Keep your cooties to yourself, Sir Idiot."

Masaomi was getting hugged by Anri and Mikado, and Black*Star was being hugged by Tsubaki.

"Hey, take it easy, guys," said Masaomi. "There's plenty of the great Masaomi Kida to go around." He was back to his idiotic self.

"Tsubaki, I can't breathe!" Black*Star said. "Too tight!"

"Oh, sorry, Black*Star," Tsubaki said apologetically. She let go of Black*Star.

"What was in that antidote anyway?" Maka asked.

"Wolfsbane," Liesel replied. "My mom taught me how to put wolfsbane in an antidote a few years ago. It works really well on most poisons, but you shouldn't eat it."

"Yeah," Ludwig said. "My friend, Feliciano Vargas, learned that the hard way and had to get his stomach pumped. He's such an idiot."

"Hey, can we get out of this city?" Chris asked.

"Not without our plane," said Sonic. "I think it's still in that temple."

"But Lord Death told us to stay away from there," said Chris.

"Our plane's in there, and that's the only way we can get out of here quickly enough," Myung said, bonking Chris on the head. "Plus, I think my clothes are on the plane. These clothes are all betattered!"

"Tattered…" Izaya and the Beilschmidt siblings said in annoyed voices.

"Whatever," Myung said, shrugging what Izaya, Liesel, Ludwig, and Gilbert said.

"We can get you into the temple," Miroku offered.

"Yeah," said Keiko. "We were on our way there now, when we saw the werewolves.

"Alright," Izaya said. "One of you can help us get inside, and the other can take care of these werewolves." At that moment, Izaya was hit with a vending machine!

"Iza!" Gilbert exclaimed. He bent down and shook Izaya. "Iza, get up! Get up, Iza!"

Izaya got up and Gilbert smiled. "Speak of the devil."

"IZAYAAAAAAAAA!" Shizuo shouted at the top of his lungs. He ran after Izaya, throwing a bunch of random werewolves and random people out of the way, including Cartman, who got stuck in a billboard, in order to clear a path for himself.

Gilbert got in front of Izaya and spread his arms out. "Don't hurt Izaya, Shizuo. Pleeeease?"

"Shizu-chan, you're free to attack me anytime you want," said Izaya. "But I think I'm the least of your problems."

Shizuo looked at the now angry mob of werewolves. "You know, for once, I actually agree with you."

Gilbert looked at Cartman in the billboard, then at Shizuo. "Are you gonna get that kid down?"

Shizuo looked at Cartman, who was screaming for Stan and Kyle to get him down. "Nah. Let the fire department handle him."

"Hey, Shizu-chan, since you're not doing anything, put these in some water and splash the werwolves," Izaya told Shizuo. He handed Shizuo a few more containers of antidote and a few more water bottles. "Keiko can help you."

"Where am I gonna get enough water?" asked Shizuo.

"Over there in that fountain, you're so smart," Liz said, pointing to the fountain in the middle of the park.

"Oh," said an embarrassed Shizuo. He had to be told where to get water from a teenage girl!

"Don't worry, we'll take care of everything," Keiko assured Izaya and the others.

"Thanks, Keiko," Miroku said. Then he turned to Izaya and the others. "Come on, we have to get to the temple." With that, he led the gang to the temple.

* * *

><p>Back at the temple, Road was looking in random places, trying to find the keys to the temple doors, but with no luck. "Oh, man! Now I remember where I put them."<p>

"That's good," Tykki said brightly. "Where?"

"I threw them out the window," said Road. She pointed towards the window.

"Road, that was a very foolish thing to do, Lero!" Lero yelled at the girl.

"I'm sorry, Lero!" Road said. She was not happy about where she put the keys, not happy AT ALL.

"Looks like we don't need the keys," said Jasdero.

"Here they come," said David.

"And they've got that Sumimura guy with them," Lulu Bell pointed out. "He'll open the door."

"Does that mean I won't need this thing?" Skin asked, pulling out a jackhammer.

"Yup," said the Millennium Earl.

* * *

><p>Back outside, Miroku unlocked the door and noticed Celty coming along. He also noticed he had Shinra with her. "Celty, what are you doing here? And why did you bring Shinra?"<p>

"Celty realized she left the chest unguarded and came back to make sure it was okay," Shinra answered for Celty. "Also, she saved me from a bunch of werewolves."

Celty took out her pager, texted, and showed it to Miroku. _"Something weird's going on."_

"Tell me about it," Miroku said.

"What did she say?" asked Amy.

"She said something weird's going on," Miroku replied. "She's right. Well, let's get inside and look for your plane."

"No, thanks," said Kid. "I'd rather check out the symmetrical architecture. It's absolutely perfect!" he had a giddy look on his face.

"Okay, Kid, we'll wait for you inside," Liz said to her friend. She and the others all went in, while Kid stayed outside and admired the outside of the temple.

* * *

><p>Kid was going on and on about the symmetry, when he heard a hissing sound. He looked down and saw a snake close by his leg. He freaked out and yelled, "WAIT FOR MEEEEE!" Kid ran inside to catch up with the others.<p>

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: <strong>Whew! I wrote eighteen pages of this chapter! Eighteen!


	4. The Idiot and the Chest, Part III

**Episode 1: The Idiot and the Chest, Part III**

Kid caught up to the others.

"Get tired of symmetry already?" Liz asked.

"Sn-sn-sn-sn-snaaaaaaake!" Kid exclaimed, shaking like a leaf. "Snake…snake…snake…"

"Oh, shut up," said Chris. "Geez, the snake's not gonna hurt you."

"Chris, if that's supposed to help, it's not," Liz said, rolling her eyes at the rich boy. "We'll calm him down; he is our Meister, after all."

"It's alright, Kid," said Patty. "The snake's not in here, so it can't get you."

"Gilbo got bit by a snake once," Ludwig said. "We thought he was gonna die."

"Yikes," said Soul.

* * *

><p>Meanwhile, the Noahs were watching the kids.<p>

Road pointed to Chris. "That kid looks _especially _stupid."

"Alright," said the Millennium Earl. "I'll get some Akumas to distract the others. Make sure you get that idiot down below so he can open the chest. If you get someone else along with him, that's fine, too." With that, he left, leaving the Noahs to do their job.

* * *

><p>"Let's see," said Izaya. Gilbert was riding on his back, smiling. "If I were a plane thief, where would I hide a plane in this building?"<p>

"Uh, do monsters normally come here?" Anri asked as she looked to the left.

"Sometimes we sense an Akuma or two," said Miroku. "Why?"

"Those," said Anri. She pointed to where she was looking. There was a bunch of Akumas coming towards them!

"Whoa!" said Liesel. "What the heck—?"

"They don't usually send this many!" said Miroku. "This isn't good."

"Iza, I'm scared," Gilbert said. He held on tight to Izaya and looked like he was about to cry.

"Don't worry, Little Prussia," said Izaya. "We'll take care of these things."

"Yeah. We can handle them," said Maka, then held out her hand and said, "Ready, Soul?"

Soul took Maka's hand and answered, "Ready, Maka." After taking Maka's hand, everyone watched as Soul turned from a boy to a scythe.

"How did he do that?" Amy asked.

"We'll explain later. We don't have time right now," said Maka. She and Soul then started fighting the Akumas.

"Soul's not the only one who can do that," said Black*Star. "Tsubaki! Shuriken Mode!"

"Right!" Tsubaki said, and changed into a shuriken. Black*Star threw Tsubaki at the things.

"Liz, Patty, you, too," said Kid.

"Got it!" the Thompson sisters said, and changed into pistols. Kid caught them and used them on the Akumas.

"Let's not let these guys have all the fun," said Sonic. "Let's help, too."

"Now you're speaking my language," Knuckles said with a cocky grin.

"You want a fight, you've got it!" said Amy. She yelled as she charged with her hammer.

"I'm just gonna hide in a corner," Chris said nervously.

"Hey, Celty, you should probably get the ones who can't fight to safety!" Izaya called out, and then went to help fight.

Celty took Shinra, Chuck, and the kids to a safe place and then started texting something on her pager. Shinra read it but didn't seem to like the message. But he could tell how Celty was feeling at the moment, so he just did as she said.

"What did she say?" Mikado asked.

"Celty says to stay here while she helps take care of these Akumas." said Shinra.

"Oh, come on! Can't we help?" said Myung. Celty shook her head and then ran to go fight.

While everyone else was fighting, they didn't seem to notice that Chris just spotted a wall opening. He wondered where it went, so he went inside. Myung saw this and followed Chris, just to make sure he didn't do anything stupid.

One Akuma almost got Tails from behind, but a green barrier caught it and destroyed it. Everyone looked and saw Keiko and Shizuo standing in the entrance.

"Good timing, Shizu-Chan," said Izaya.

"How many times do I have to tell you not to call me that?" Shizuo asked.

"Take it easy, Shizu-Chan," said Izaya. "It's just a nickname that I like to call you."

"Well, it's stupid!" Shizuo snapped.

"Calm down!" yelled Keiko. "We're fighting Akumas, not each other!"

"You're right. I'm sorry," said Shizuo.

"Me too," said Izaya. "For myself _and _Shizu-Chan that is."

Shizuo was about to say something back, but they heard screaming. Everyone looked and saw that an Akuma had just grabbed Shinra by his coat collar.

"Help me!" Shinra yelled, mainly to Celty.

"Don't even think about attacking me," said the Akuma. "Or else this guy's toast."

'_Oh no!_' Celty screamed in her head. '_I have to save Shinra!_' Celty got ready to try and help Shinra, but Shizuo stopped her; and it looked like he already had an idea.

"Shinra, lift up your arms," Shizuo calmly said to Shinra.

As Shizuo told him, Shinra slowly lifted his arms up. He kept on lifting up his arms until he fell right through his coat. After landing on his butt, Shinra got up and ran right to Celty. The Akuma tried to go after Shinra, but Maka used Soul to destroy it. When they finally destroyed the last of the Akumas, everyone was relieved.

"Thank god that's over," said Liesel.

"What the heck was all that about?" Black*Star yelled.

"Miroku, do you think we should tell them?" Keiko asked.

"Well, I don't see what harm it could do," said Miroku.

"Tell us what?" Anri asked, wanting to know already.

"Well, we normally like to keep this stuff private, but it doesn't look like that's the option," Keiko replied. "You see, a long time ago, long before Miroku and I were born, the Sumimura and Yukimura families worked together to trap the most dangerous demons inside a chest that's hidden inside this temple."

"And generation after generation has been charged with guarding that chest from anyone who might try to open it and release the demons," said Miroku. "And now that duty has been passed to me and Keiko."

"It's kinda weird that we have to work together on this, 'cause our families don't get along when it comes to Karasumori," Keiko said.

"What's that got to do with our plan?" asked Tails.

"Obviously, whoever stole your plane is trying to free the demons," Keiko said.

"But who would do a crazy thing like that?" Patty blurted out.

* * *

><p>"Chris, we've been walking down this hall for a long time," Myung complained. Her feet were starting to get tired. "What are you looking for?"<p>

"A way outta here!" said Chris.

"Oh, brother," Myung said to herself. She face palmed, then spoke again. "With your sense of direction, I wouldn't be surprised if we wandered into a burial chamber, Sir Idiot."

"Why do you keep calling me that?" Chris whined.

"Because you are an idiot," said Myung. "Therefore, I dub you Sir Idiot, Knight of the Dummy Table." She and Chris then found a door.

"Hey, what's behind there?" Chris asked.

Myung sighed. "Guess we better find out." The two kids pushed the door open and went into another room and were surprised at what they saw. The room looked like it was designed to be a set for some kind of game show. "What's this?"

Suddenly, an announcer jumped out of nowhere and got in Chris and Myung's faces. "Hello, there! It's time for 'Best Buddies'!" Chris screamed and jumped into an irritated Myung's arms. What the two didn't know was that the "announcer" was actually Road's dad in disguise.

"Oh my God," said Chris. "'Best Buddies'? I love that show!"

"Don't you think it's odd that there's a game show set down here?" Myung asked her idiotic friend.

"Does this mean we're contestants?" asked Chris, clearly ignoring Myung.

"You got it, kids!" said Sheril Kamelot said with a stupid-looking grin. "Now, come on down…uh, what are your names?"

"I'm Chris Thorndyke," said Chris. "Ask me any question, because Genius is my middle name."

"I thought your middle name was Ashley," Myung corrected. "By the way, my name's Myung Ishii. And we're not exactly best friends." Everyone laughed at Chris.

"That's okay," said Sheril. "You're friends, so that's enough." He pushed Chris and Myung towards the podium in the center of the room.

"Wait, I don't wanna play!" Myung protested. But it was too late; the game was already starting. Myung groaned. _'Oh, drat,' _she thought.

"It's time for 'Best Buddies'!" Sheril said. "Let's meet our contestants. First up, these two come from California. Meet Jake and Drake!" Clapping was heard, and Jasdero and David in disguise both waved.

"Hey, Chris, is it just me, or do those two look a little weird?" Myung asked.

"It's probably just you," Chris said with a yawn.

"And here are our other contestants," said Sheril. "They just flew in today. Meet Chris and Myung!"

"The public loves me, they just love me!" said Chris. He blew kisses in a dramatic fashion.

"Shut up," said Myung.

"Now, do you all know the rules, or shall I go over them?" Sheril asked.

"I don't need to review the rules," said Chris. "I watch the show all the time."

"So do we!" Jasdero and David said.

"And what about you?" Sheril asked Myung.

"I don't watch the show too much," said Myung.

"Don't worry, I'll talk her through it," said Chris.

"Alright," said Sheril. "Now, let the game begin!"

"It's pretty easy, Myung," Chris explained. "First, you answer some questions about me, then I answer some about you."

"Oh, okay," said Myung. "Thanks."

"First question," said Sheril. "What is your best friend's favorite food? Jake, what is Drake's favorite food?"

"Pizza, dude," "Jake" replied in a surfer's voice.

"Dude," "Drake" groaned in the same surfer voice. Then he held up a card that said 'hot dogs' on it in crayon.

"Chris, what is Myung's favorite food?" Sheril asked the idiotic boy.

"Well, if I know Myung really well, I'd say her favorite food is roast beef," said Chris.

"Oddly enough, that's right," said Myung. Then she held up a card with 'roast beef' written on it. _'I didn't think he'd get that right,' _she thought.

"Next question: Where was your buddy born?" asked Sheril.

"Nebraska, duh," said "Jake".

"Dude, I wasn't born in Nebraska," said "Drake". "I was born in Beverly Hills."

"Chris, where was Myung born?" asked Sheril.

"Um, I'm thinking Tokyo," Chris replied. Myung held up a cue card that said 'Station Square'. "Oh, right…I forgot."

"You remember my favorite food, but you don't where I was born?" Myung said. "We've been going to the same school for years, idiot!"

"Okay, final question," said Sheril. "What is your friend's favorite movie?"

"That's an easy one," said "Jake". "_how to Lose a Guy in 10 Days_!" "Drake", who was turning red in the face, held up a cue card with the same movie title that "Jake" announced. Road, who was watching, was having a really tough time keeping herself from laughing at that.

"Good fake answer," "Jake" whispered to "Drake".

"Uh, actually…" said "Drake". "That was real."

"WHAT?" "Jake" exclaimed.

"Chris?" Sheril asked.

"Well…um…" Chris said.

'_Come on, Chris, you should know this one!' _Myung thought.

"Um…it's…um…" said Chris. "I got it! It's _Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade_!" Myung smiled proudly at Chris, holding up a cue card with the same movie title.

"Now, for the next round, Myung, you must answer questions about Chris," said Sheril.

"I think I can do that," Myung said confidently.

* * *

><p>As the game went on, Jasdero and David purposely gave Sheril the wrong answers to the questions, leaving Chris and Myung as the winners, because they got most of their answers right.<p>

* * *

><p>After the game, Sheril congratulated Chris and Myung on their victory. "Okay, here are your choices. Behind curtain number one is the X-Tornado 300!" The curtain pulled back to reveal said plane. Road was standing next to it, wearing a pretty dress.<p>

"Hey, that's our plane!" said Myung.

"Yesiree, you'll be flying in style with this fully-equipped piece of aircraft, complete with its very own inflatable rubber ducky!" said Sheril.

"Hey, that's what that stupid brat Gilbert was tangled in," said Chris. He started laughing at the memory of seeing Gilbert crying after he and his friends landed their plane and found the child tangled up in the strings of the big duck.

"Shut your mouth, Chris," said Myung.

"Or, you could go with what's behind curtain number two," Sheril said. That curtain pulled back and revealed a fancy-looking clubhouse. "A super clubhouse!"

"Wow!" Chris exclaimed.

"Yes," said Sheril. "This luxurious mansion comes with a Jacuzzi and swimming pool that fits fifty people, and lots of spacious rooms!"

"Please, please, Myung, can we get the clubhouse?" Chris pleaded.

"I dunno, Chris," said Myung. "I really think we should go for the plane."

"Can't make up your minds?" asked Sheril. "How about what's in…the box?" Chris and Myung saw the chest of demons, but they didn't know that. To them, the chest looked like a creepy -looking thing.

"And let me say this," says Sheril. "There's something inside this box that's so amazing, so incredible, so astounding, that it'll take your breath away!"

"Oooooohhhhhh," said Chris. He became fascinated by the box.

"Well, kids? What'll it be?" asked Sheril.

Chris and Myung started thinking as they heard the audience chant, "Take the box!" about four or five times. Then Sheril appeared right in front of the camera.

"We'll be right back with their answer after these messages," said Sheril.

* * *

><p>Meanwhile, the others were all still looking for the plane, unaware that they were missing a couple people.<p>

"Oh, man," said Amy. "How big is this place? I still don't see our plane anywhere!"

Gilbert was holding on tight to his brother and sister. "I'm scared, guys." He looked up Liesel and Ludwig with big, red-violet eyes.

"It's okay, Gilbo," Liesel said gently as she picked Gilbert up and carried him on her back. "Big brother and sister are here. We won't let anything hurt you, I promise."

"Keep looking," Izaya told Amy. "I'm sure your plane's around here somewhere."

"Hey, Kid, you think maybe your dad knows where it is?" Maka asked.

"Probably," said Kid. As if on cue, a big puff of smoke appeared. It cleared, and everyone saw Lord Death, Spirit, and Professor Stein standing right in front of them.

"Of course I know where it is," said Lord Death. "My sources are never wrong. I see that your aircraft is downstairs in the Crypt of Darkness."

"How'd it get down there?" asked Soul.

"It was taken there by the Noah Clan," Stein said. "From what I've heard, their only goal in life is to get a mortal like yourselves to open the chest of demons. They'd open it themselves, but they're forbidden."

Sprit laughed. "Luckily, no one but a complete fool would ever open such an awful box."

Maka started laughing. "I agree with my father. Only an idiot would open that thing."

Sonic laughed, too. "I know. Not even Knuckles would open that thing, and he's one of the most gullible people I know."

"Hey!" said Knuckles.

"No offense, pal," said Sonic.

"There's only one person I know who would open that thing, and that's Lui over here," Liesel said. She jerked her thumb in Ludwig's direction and snickered.

"Liesel!" Ludwig groaned. "I'm not that stupid."

"Guys I just did a head count," said Shinra. "We're missing two people."

"Really?" asked Chuck. "Who?"

"Chris and Myung," Shinra said.

"I wouldn't worry about Myung," said Shizuo. "She seems like the type of person who wouldn't open a chest like that."

"I agree, Shizu-chan," said Izaya. "And then there's the not-so-smart Chris Klondike." Everyone froze in shock at what Izaya just said.

"That can't be good!" said Tsubaki.

* * *

><p>Back on the fake game show set, Chris and Myung were getting ready to make up their minds.<p>

"Well, what's it going to be, kids?" asked Sheril. "Did you pick a prize?"

"The box!" Chris whispered.

"No, Chris, the plane!" Myung whispered back.

"A plane's one thing, and so is a house," said Chris. "But the box could be anything! It could be a vacation! Or even a plane! You know how much we need a plane."

"So take the plane," said Myung.

"We'll take the box," said Chris. The "audience" applauded.

"No, Chris, I said take the plane!" Myung shouted.

"Trust me, I'm pretty sure I know what I'm doing," said Chris.

"So, you've decided to go with the box," said Sheril. "Care to tell us why?"

"Well, I guess you could say we had a dumb hunch," said Chris.

"More like _you _did," Myung mumbled.

"Well, then, let's find out just how dumb your hunch really was!" said Sheril.

"I'm guessing pretty dumb," said Myung.

* * *

><p>Everyone was running to the crypt, hoping to get there before Chris opened the chest. Keiko and Miroku were leading the way because, naturally, they knew the way.<p>

"Oh, I hope we're not too late!" said Liz.

"Sonic, get to the front!" said Knuckles. "You're the fastest."

"Alright," said Sonic. He flashed all the way to the front.

Myung watched as Chris put a hand on the chest, getting ready to open it. She got a chill up her spine and shivered. "What was that?" Then she saw Sonic and the others watching in.

"No, don't open that!" Miroku yelled. But by the time he could finish what he was saying, it was too late. Chris already cracked the lid open a little, and a bunch of horrifying demons came flying out.

"Too late," said Mikado.

"What did we win?" Chris asked.

"Thirteen ghosts, in a wide variety of shapes, powers, and colors," said Sheril. "And they're all yours!"

Myung tackled Chris and started strangling him. "You idiot! Look what you just did!"

"How was I supposed to know?" asked Chris.

"I told you to take the damn plane!" said Myung.

"Wait a minute…Myung told you to take the plane?" asked Sonic. "And you picked the chest?"

"Yeah, I thought it'd be something cool," said Chris. Celty walked up to him and punched him.

"That is, by far, the stupidest thing I've ever seen anyone do!" Shizuo shouted. He wanted very badly to throw something at the kid, but couldn't find anything big enough.

"You might wanna save the argument for later," Stein said. "Hit the deck!" He and everyone else ducked as the spirits came right at them and began escaping from the temple.

* * *

><p>"Just listen to them cheer!" Tyki said. "They love us now!"<p>

"Yeah!" said the Millennium Earl. "And they're coming this way to thank us." The demons got close to the Noahs but didn't stop.

"Uh, I don't think they're coming to thank us," said Lulu Bell. She and the other Noahs got flattened like pancakes.

"You're…welcome?" the Noah Clan said, as if the spirits were rude to them.

* * *

><p>Everyone looked on in terror as the demons made their way out of the temple, then scattered in thirteen different directions.<p>

"There go the most foul demons and spirits in the world!" said Lord Death. "And they'll haunt the world until they're returned to the chest! And it's all thanks to you, Sir Idiot, Knight of the Dummy Table!"

"Are you insane?" Chris said. "How is it my fault?"

"You're the one who opened the stupid chest, Chris!" Amy said angrily.

"How are we supposed to trap ghosts in that thing, anyway?" asked Chris.

"You figure it out," said Lord Death. "The thirteen spirits can only be returned to the chest by the one who released them. Mainly you, Sir Idiot."

"Oh, man!" said Chris.

"Don't worry, Chris," said Sonic. "I'll be there to help you."

"And Knuckles and I will be there for you, Sonic," said Tails.

"So will I," Amy said.

"I'm with you guys, too," Myung said.

"I'm not sure I want to be a part of this," said Chuck. "I think I'm getting too old for ghost hunting."

"I'm gonna come, too," Izaya said. "I love humans, after all. And I can't abandon Liesel, Lui, and Gilbo, so they're coming, too. I've gotta get them to Austria, after all."

"You guys can use all the help you can get," said Shizuo. "So, for the time being, I'll put up with Izaya and come with you."

"That's nice of you, Shizu-chan," said Izaya.

"Hey, I have a question," said Chris. "Izaya, why not just leave Gilbert here and take Liesel and Ludwig with you? I can't stand that little insect."

Gilbert started crying, and Izaya picked him up and glared at Chris.

"You know," said Izaya. "I'd just as soon leave YOU here, shithead! Calling an adorable little kid like Gilbo an insect, and saying that I should just abandon him? Geez!"

"I think I may be able to lend a hand as well," Masaomi volunteered.

"Me, too," said Mikado.

"I'm sure I can help," Anri said quietly.

"What about you, Celty?" Shinra asked.

_I think I want to stay here with Shinra, _Celty texted.

"Fair enough," said Izaya. "I'll let you know if we find your head."

"You guys'll definitely need some help from Black*Star the Great!" said Black*Star.

"And Black*Star's gonna need me, so count me in, too," Tsubaki said. Soul and Maka agreed to come along as well.

"NOOOOOO, MY LITTLE MAKA! I DON'T WANT YOU FIGHTING THOSE DEMONS! WAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" Spirit wailed.

"Stop it, Dad, you're embarrassing me!" said Maka.

Lord Death sighed. "What am I gonna do with you, Spirit?"

"I guess that means Patty and I are in, too," said Liz.

"And so am I," said Kid.

"No, there is no way I'm letting my precious son fight the most dangerous monsters in the world!" Lord Death sobbed. He was suffocating Kid in his arms.

"Dad, let go! I can't breathe!" Kid said.

"Oh, sorry," Lord Death said and let go of Kid so he could breathe.

"Don't worry about him, Lord Death," said Stein. "He'll be fine. The same goes for Maka, Spirit."

"Oh, alright," said Lord Death. "Well, you'll need to stay in contact with me, so I'll give you this mirror. Maka, you know my number, so I'm putting you in charge. I don't trust Sir Idiot not to use it as a vanity mirror."

"Thanks, Lord Death," said Maka. She took the mirror he handed to her.

"Hey!" Chris whined at what Lord Death said about him.

"And here are our numbers and email addresses in case you need to contact us," Shinra said.

* * *

><p>Everyone then took off for their first destination: Vienna, Austria, where they would take the Beilschmidt siblings home to their cousin.<p> 


	5. Meet the Annoying Roderich

**Author's Note: **This "episode" is mostly a filler for the story.

* * *

><p><strong>Episode 2: Meet the Annoying Roderich<strong>

The group had been flying all day, but it got late. They decided to stay at a hotel and continue in the morning. So far, they hadn't found any of the thirteen spirits. Not that they minded; they were actually enjoying not having to fight ghosts just yet.

* * *

><p>Chris was pouting, mostly because Maka wouldn't let him hold Lord Death's mirror. Her reason was she just knew he would drop it.<p>

"Could you guys at least let me hold the Chest of Demons?" Chris asked.

Shizuo was watching TV when he heard Chris' question. "Not gonna happen." He didn't even look at Chris.

"Why not?" Chris whined like the big baby he was.

"Because we caught you a moment ago using it as a footrest," Soul said. "The Chest isn't a footrest, stupid!"

"I'm not stupid, stupid!" said Chris.

While Chris was arguing with Soul, Kid wouldn't stop straightening out the pictures right above the Beilschmidt siblings' bed. This disturbed all three of them, especially Gilbert.

"Lise, Lui, make him stop," Gilbert groaned.

"Perfect!" Kid said with pride when he finally got the pictures right.

"Big Bro, Big Sis, make him get off our bed!" Gilbert said.

"Kid, do you mind?" Ludwig said irritably, his eyebrow twitching.

"Yeah, Gilbo's trying to take a nap, dummkopf," Liesel said.

"Okay, okay, sorry," Kid said and hopped off the siblings' bed.

"So, guys," Maka said to the Beilschmidt siblings. "How did you end up all the way in Japan, when your cousin's in Austria?"

"It's complicated," Ludwig said, not really wanting to say how they ended up in Japan.

"A few months ago, when we lived in Munich, our parents died in some freak accident, I think," Liesel said. "Mom and Dad were at some party, and left me in charge of Lui and Gilbo. The police came to our door in the middle of the night and told us what happened. They let us pack some things and took us out of the house and to a group home, where we waited until they contacted Roderich, who's living in his own place in Vienna."

"So, what happened then?" Soul asked.

"Did Roderich come for you guys?" asked Tsubaki.

"Yeah, he did," Ludwig replied. "But…"

"But he was put in the hospital practically as soon as he arrived in Munich," Liesel finished for her brother. "Lui, Gilbo, and I were there with him when it happened."

"We were shopping, and Roddy bought Prussia for me," Gilbert said.

"Aw, so that's where you got your awesome teddy?" Izaya asked.

"Yeah," said Gilbert.

"Anyway," Liesel continued. "We had just gotten out of the toy store, when another store exploded! Roddy pushed us all out of the way, but he got hurt badly, and had to go back to a hospital in Vienna."

"That's when we saw that bastard," Ludwig put in. "The damn Millennium Earl! Top hat and all."

"What does the Millennium Earl have to do with what happened to your cousin?" asked Liz.

"He told us he hurt Roddy," Gilbo said, on the verge of crying. "And he told us that he'd kill us!"

"So we've been on the run ever since," said Liesel. "We never even tried contacting Roddy, 'cause we didn't want to put him in any more danger."

"And you changed your mind about seeing him now, because…?" Masaomi asked.

"He's family," Ludwig replied.

"Yeah, we need him," Gilbert said.

"Besides, I can't guarantee that I'll always be around to keep them safe from that top-hatted son of a bitch," said Izaya.

"Whaddya mean, Iza?" Gilbert asked in a scared voice.

"Oh…nothing, Gilbo, nothing," Izaya said quickly, not wanting to upset the child. "Just go back to your nap, alright, Little Prussia?"

"Okay," Gilbert said quietly. He lay down, and Liesel and Ludwig tucked him in.

"Hey, does Roderich know you're coming?" Mikado asked.

"Yeah," Ludwig said. "We called him yesterday and told him we'd be in Austria tomorrow."

Liesel laughed a little. "He's probably camping out at the airport right now." This got everybody—even Sir Idiot—chuckle slightly.

* * *

><p>At the airport in Vienna, lots of people were coming and going. Every now and again, they would glance, and even giggle, at a man with black hair sleeping on the floor in a sleeping bag. The man's fake glasses were safely tucked in a side pocket of the sleeping bag. The man was Roderich Edelstein. He was Liesel, Ludwig, and Gilbert's cousin, and now he was better and had been out of the hospital for the last couple of months. He was getting ready to meet his cousins when Liesel and Ludwig had contacted him and told him they were coming.<p>

"Roddykins, they won't be arriving until tomorrow," Roderich's girlfriend, Elizabeta Hedervary, said. She had a sleeping bag with her as well, because she just knew that she wouldn't be able to pull Roderich out of the airport.

Roderich looked over at Elizabeta. "Even so, I want to be here the second they arrive."

"Okay," Elizabeta said and shrugged. "Suit yourself."

"You know, you don't have to stay here with me," said Roderich.

"I just wanna make sure nobody harasses or mugs you," said Elizabeta.

"No one's gonna try to mug me!" Roderich said indignantly. And wouldn't you know it? Someone came up to Roderich.

"Give me your money!" the guy said, pointing a knife at the Austrian. Roderich shook as he got his cheap-ass wallet out.

"Get away from my Roddykins!" Elizabeta said. She took out a frying pan she had with her for some unknown reason and swung it at the mugger. The mugger ran away, scared of Elizabeta.

"You can keep your money!" the mugger said in a high, scared voice as he ran away. "I'll go now! AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!"

"That was scary," Roderich said.

"It's okay, he won't bother you anymore," said Elizabeta.

"Thanks, Lizzie," Roderich said, then hugged her. "Don't leave my side, my love!"

"I won't, and neither will the other women in your harem," said Elizabeta.

* * *

><p>The next day, the Beilschmidt siblings and the others were on a plane to Austria. Shizuo looked unhappy, and probably for a good reason.<p>

"I can't believe I have to sit next this damn flea," Shizuo grumbled. He was, of course, talking about Izaya, who was bouncing Gilbert on his knees.

"_**We're on our way to Austria, to Austria, to Austria!" **_Liesel, Ludwig, Izaya and Gilbert sang at the top of their lungs. _**"We're on our way to Austria, to Austria, to Austria!"**_

"You know, Shizuo, Mikado offered to trade tickets with you before we boarded," Masaomi said. "You should've taken him up on his offer."

"But then he'd be stuck with this guy," Shizuo said.

"_**We're on our way to Austria, to Austria, to Austria! We're on our way to Austria, to Austria, to Austria!"**_

"SHUT THE HELL UP, YOU LITTLE SHITBAGS!" a man named Raditz shouted. "As if the family reunion wasn't annoying enough, I have to be stuck in coach with a bunch of annoying kids! AGH!"

"Excuse me?" Black*Star yelled.

"Black*Star, let it go," Tsubaki said.

"Stay out of this, Tsubaki," said Black*Star. Then he turned and spoke to Raditz. "You know, I was just gonna throw spit wads at Kid for entertainment, but now, you're my bitch!"

Before Raditz could say anything back, a flight attendant named Sakura came up to them.

"If you guys can't keep it down, then you're going to be kicked off this flight," Sakura said and glared at Izaya, Liesel, Ludwig, Gilbert, Raditz, and Black*Star.

"Sorry," the noisemakers said and sat quietly in their seats.

"Thank you," Shizuo said with relief.

Sakura walked right up to Izaya and the Beilschmidt siblings, looking at the three kids. "Do you want anything else?"

"Can I have ice cream?" Gilbert asked.

"Of course," Sakura said and smiled. She patted Gilbert on the head and walked off, coming back minutes later with an ice cream sandwich. "Here you go."

"Thanks!" Gilbert said and took the ice cream. Then he started eating it to his heart's content.

* * *

><p>After a long time in the air, the plane landed at the airport in Vienna, Austria, where Roderich and Elizabeta were waiting inside. The kids all got out of the plane and retrieved the luggage they brought with them.<p>

Anri looked out the window. "Wow, this is Vienna?"

"It's so beautiful," Myung said.

Chris looked outside. "Puh. It's not so great."

"Shut up, Chris," said Amy.

Gilbert looked around the airport, searching for any sign of Roderich and/or Elizabeta. "Lise, Lui, where's Roddy? I don't see him. What if he didn't come?"

"Don't say that, Gilbo," Liesel said gently. "He's here somewhere."

"Hey, I think I see him," Ludwig said. Indeed, he did; Roderich was standing with Elizabeta, the both of them looking around at the many people coming and going.

"Roddy!" Liesel called. She waved to her cousin and his girlfriend. She and her brothers started running to quickly get to them. "Roddy, over here!"

"Hey, over here, pimp!" Ludwig said.

"I'm not a pimp!" Roderich yelled. He stood where he was and waited until his cousins and their new friends got to him and Elizabeta. "Lise, Lui, Gilbo, you're here." He hugged Liesel and Ludwig, then picked Gilbert up. "Where have you three been? Why didn't you call me earlier?"

"Sorry, Roddy, but we didn't want the Millennium Earl to hurt you anymore," Gilbert said. "He told us he'd kill us, and that he hurt you that day in Munich." He gave his teddy bear a tight squeeze.

"Who are your friends?" Elizabeta asked.

"I'm Izaya Orihara," Izaya said. "And these guys are Shizu-chan, Masaomi Kida, Mikado Ryuugamine, Anri Sonohara, Sonic the Hedgehog, Amy Rose, Knuckles the Echidna, Tails, Death the Kid, a.k.a. Symmetry Freak, Myung Ishii, Sir Idiot, Knight of the Dummy Table, Soul Eater Evans, Maka Albarn, Liz and Patty Thompson, Black*Star, and Tsubaki Nakatsukasa."

"Sir Idiot?" Elizabeta said.

"My name is Chris Thorndyke, not Sir Idiot!" said Chris.

"And I'm not a symmetry freak!" Kid said.

"Yeah, right," Liz and Patty said together, knowing full well that their Meister was, in fact, a symmetry freak.

"And don't call me Shizu-chan!" a pissed-off Shizuo said. "My name is Shizuo Heiwajima, NOT SHIZU-CHAN!"

"Whatever," said Izaya.

"Uh, nice to meet you all," Roderich said. "You all look like a band of ruffians to me." Then he started nagging his cousins while everyone else looked a little annoyed or pissed off. "Liesel Angelika Beilschmidt, how could you choose _him _as your boyfriend?" He pointed to Izaya.

Liesel turned red with embarrassment. "Roderich! He's not my boyfriend! Izaya's my friend, dummkopf!"

"Oh…" said Roderich. Then he started nagging Ludwig. "Ludwig Peter Beilschmidt, what the heck is your hair doing in that style? It should be slicked back!" He started combing Ludwig's bangs back.

"Roddy, cut it out! Stop it," Ludwig whined.

Then, when Roderich was done, he started nagging Gilbert. "Gilbert Wilhelm Beilschmidt, why are your shoes dirty? And why is your hair not neat like your brother's?"

"Um…" Gilbert said. "I…I forgot to clean them, Roddy. I'm sorry."

"Okay, that's alright," said Roderich. "But your hair looks sloppy!" He tried brushing it back, but it bounced back to its natural style.

"That's the way my hair always looks, Roddy!" Gilbert said. "Don't brush it back!"

Izaya and the others rolled their eyes. Boy, Roderich Edelstein could be really annoying, and they knew it upon meeting him.

"Well, come on, everybody," Roderich said, gathering his cousins' bags. "Let's go home." Elizabeta carried her and Roderich's sleeping bags, then she, Roderich, the Beilschmidts, and their friends headed out of the airport. "Oh, and you guys can go back to wherever you came from. Thanks for bringing my cousins here safely."

"Roddy, don't be rude," Elizabeta scolded her boyfriend.

"Yeah, Roddy, can't they stay for a while?" Gilbert asked. He gave Roderich the puppy eyes. "Pleeeeeeeaaaaaase, Roddy?"

"Oh, I…alright, they can stay," Roderich gave in. He couldn't resist little Gilbert's big, sad puppy eyes. "Come on, everyone, there's plenty of room at my place."

"Yeah!" Sonic and the others cheered. They followed Roderich, Elizabeta, Liesel, Ludwig, and Gilbert outside. Izaya called a cab, while Kid, Liz, and Patty had their own ride, and Roderich, Elizabeta, Liesel, Ludwig, and Gilbert went to Elizabeta's car.

* * *

><p>Minutes later, everybody was on their way to Roderich and Elizabeta's place.<p>

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: <strong>The Sakura mentioned on the plane is Princess Sakura from Tsubasa: Reservoir Chronicle.


	6. The Pimpin' Hotel

**Episode 3: The Pimpin' Hotel**

Sonic and friends later arrived at Roderich's house, which he called "The Pimpin' Hotel" for some reason. They all stepped out of their vehicles.

"Hello, and welcome to The Pimpin' Hotel," Roderich announced like some tour guide. "My humble—well, not so humble, actually—abode."

The other guys gazed at the townhouse in awe.

"Pfft," Chris scoffed at Roderich's house. "It's not as nice as my house."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Liesel, Ludwig, and Gilbert yelled at the idiot boy.

"Well, compared to my house in America, your stupid cousin's house is like a shack," Chris replied in a snotty manner.

Annoyed at Chris' comment, Myung punched Chris in the face. "Shut up, Sir Idiot of the Round Table."

"That's not my name and you know it!" Chris whined like the baby he was.

Myung turned away from Chris. "Whatever."

"Wow!" Amy exclaimed. "This place is huge!"

"Wait till you see the inside, Pinky," a voice behind the group said to Amy. Everyone jumped, startled, and turned around to see who the voice belonged to: A fourteen-year-old boy with long blond hair, worn in two braids, and purple eyes like Roderich. He was wearing a school uniform, had a backpack on one shoulder, and was pulling a luggage case behind him.

"Hey, little girl you nearly gave us all heart attacks!" said Knuckles.

"Who are you, anyway?" Sonic asked.

"I'm Konrad Edelstein," the boy introduced himself. He then addressed Knuckles. "And, FYI, I'm not a girl, I'm a boy! Dummkopf."

"He's my brother," Roderich mumbled, obviously not pleased to see Konrad.

"Oh…sorry," an embarrassed Knuckles said.

Masaomi laughed at the echidna. "Hahahahaha! Knuckles is stupid, Knuckles is stupid, Knuckles is stupid."

"Masaomi, stop teasing him," Mikado said. "You wouldn't find it funny if that happened to you."

"Oh, please, I can tell a boy from a girl a mile away," Masaomi boasted. "That's how awesome I am. Saki thinks I'm awesome."

"Oh, there you go, bringing Saki into it again," Anri said and rolled her eyes.

"Well, she is my girlfriend," said Masaomi.

"So, you're the mysterious cousin Konrad?" Izaya asked.

"Yeah," Konrad replied.

"Konrad, some people on the plane were mean to us!" Gilbert said.

"That's not nice," Konrad said. "Where are they? I'll beat them up, just like I did to some bullies at school…Oops."

Roderich's eyes narrowed. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Uh…nothing, Roddy," Konrad lied.

"Let's get inside, and we'll talk about this," Elizabeta said sternly. She and Roderich led Konrad, their cousins, and everyone else inside, deliberately forgetting Chris and locking him outside.

"Hey!" Chris yelled. "Let me in! Let me in, dammit!"

"Roddy, he said the "D" word," Gilbert said.

Elizabeta opened the door. "Roddy and I will only let you in if you solemnly swear not to pick on Gilbert just because of his hair and eyes."

"I swear," Chris replied.

"Good," said Roderich. He and Elizabeta let Chris in.

Roderich and Elizabeta showed Liesel, Ludwig, and Gilbert to their rooms; Liesel had her own room, while her brothers shared a room. Then they showed the others to their own rooms. After everyone got settled, they went to explore the house, while Roderich and Elizabeta were having a very serious talk with Konrad.

* * *

><p>"Konrad, we have to talk," Roderich said firmly.<p>

"Uh…what's wrong, bro?" Konrad asked hesitantly, knowing what was wrong.

"You know what's wrong," said Elizabeta. "You said outside that you beat up some kids at school!"

"Is that true?" Roderich asked.

"Uh…yeah," said Konrad.

"Is that why you're home right now?" Roderich asked.

"Yeah," said Konrad. He opened his backpack, pulled out a letter, and handed it to his big brother. "Here, it's from the headmaster."

Roderich took the letter from his brother and read it. "Suspended? For a month?"

"Sorry, bro," said Konrad. "But they had it coming."

"The kids you beat up?" asked Elizabeta. "What did they ever do to you?"

"They called me a girly boy because of my hair," said Konrad. "Then they made fun of Lili because she cut her hair like her brother's, so I had to defend her! Oh, by the way, she got in trouble, too, because she lied to the headmaster about what happened, which led to him finding out the truth, which led to both of us being suspended. And, well…here I am."

Roderich was not amused. "I'm not amused, Konrad. You're grounded for three weeks."

"What?" Konrad exclaimed angrily. "You're not my dad, Roddy! You're just my brother!"

"I am your legal guardian since Mom and Dad died!" Roderich exploded. "And you're still grounded."

"Fine, stupid!" Konrad said back. He then flipped Roderich off and stormed up to his room, taking his stuff with him.

* * *

><p>Meanwhile, Death the Kid was looking at pictures of the family. Some of them had both the Edelstein and Beilschmidt families, while some just had Roderich, Konrad, and their parents. Roderich's father, Frederick, looked a lot like Roderich, except he was wearing a Technicolor pimp coat, a pimp hat, and was carrying a diamond-studded walking stick in one hand. His mother, Nina—the Beilschmidt sibs' father's older sister—looked a lot like Konrad (except for the eyes). Roderich was also wearing a pimp coat and a pimp hat, and Konrad's hair was a little shorter, and he looked embarrassed to be standing next to his dad and brother. The picture looked like it had been taken about three or four years ago.<p>

"Sort of makes you wonder what Roddy's mom saw in his dad," Liz commented on the picture.

"Yeah," said Patty.

Kid was still observing the photo. "Looks a little off. I'm gonna fix it." He grabbed hold of the picture and tried adjusting it, when Roderich came into the room with Elizabeta.

"I don't know what I'm going to do with that boy," Roderich said exasperatedly. "Ever since Mom and Dad's accident last year, he's—" He stopped when he saw Kid adjusting the picture of him and his family. "Leave my pictures alone, Kid."

Kid stepped away from the picture. "I was just trying to even it up."

"I want it uneven," Roderich said through gritted teeth. "It's my picture. Even up your own pictures." He made the picture uneven again, then walked into another room with Elizabeta.

* * *

><p>In another part of the house, Soul and Maka were admiring some of Roderich's decorations.<p>

"You know, Soul, he's actually got pretty good taste," said Maka.

"Yeah, he does," Soul agreed. Then he spotted a piano and went over to it. He sat down and started playing.

Roderich and Elizabeta heard music and went to Roderich's music room to see what was going on. They saw Soul playing the piano and noticed that he was amazing.

Not long after, everyone else heard Soul playing and came to listen.

"Wow, Black*Star, is that the 14th's Melody?" Tsubaki asked quietly.

"I think it is," Black*Star replied.

"How come Soul never told us he could play piano?" Liz asked.

"Dunno," said Kid. "But he's amazing, and everything in the room's in perfect symmetry!"

"Symmetry freak," Izaya and Gilbert said to each other.

Soul heard the others talking and stopped playing. He smiled sheepishly. "You could hear me, couldn't you?"

"Yup," Shizuo said.

"You're really good," said Roderich.

"I don't think he's so great," Chris said, snobby as usual.

"Just the thing one would expect from someone who doesn't appreciate music," Knuckles commented.

"Why don't you play more often?" Mikado asked.

"'cause I'm not really that great compared to my brother," Soul explained.

"But you can be great, Soul," Roderich said. "I can teach you. You have a gift. It would be a shame to squander it."

"Squander…" Liesel, Ludwig, and Gilbert said like Kenan and Kel in "Kenan and Kel".

"Must you three always mock me?" Roderich asked his cousins.

"Mmmmm….yeah," the Beilschmidt sibs said.

"I don't know; I'm trying to be a Death Scythe," said Soul. "I'm not sure if I can learn how to be a pianist."

"Don't be silly, Soul," Roderich said, getting in the teen's face. "You can be a musician and a Death Scythe. I see no reason why not. Why, there are many people who are two things at the same time."

"It's true," Shizuo agreed with the man with the fake glasses.

"Go on, Soul," Maka said encouragingly. "You can do it."

Maka's words were just what Soul needed. "Alright. I'll do it. I want you to teach me, Roddy."

"Good," said a happy Roderich. "We'll start tomorrow afternoon."

"Okay," Soul said and smiled. Maka smiled at seeing her friend so happy.

* * *

><p>Later that night, with everyone finally settled in and having seen some of the sites of Vienna, Chris heard music blasting downstairs. "What the hell is going on?"<p>

"Beats me," said Myung. She and Chris, along with the others, journeyed downstairs to find out the source of the infernal noise. Liesel was carrying a very sleepy Gilbert in her arms, because he was nearly fallen on the floor from being so tired.

"That better not be what I think it is," Konrad said.

"What are you talking about?" Sonic asked.

"I'd rather not talk about it," said Konrad. He felt his face flush in embarrassment.

* * *

><p>Once they were downstairs, the group saw that Roderich was having a sexy party. Elizabeta was there, along with some other girls: Blair, Sakura Haruno, Nami, Nico Robin, Mikuru Asahina, Haruhi Suzumiya, Mai Valentine, Viletta Nu, and Simca. The nine other girls were part of Roderich's harem. Elizabeta was, too, but she was Roderich's main girlfriend.<p>

"Oh no," Ludwig groaned and facepalmed. "Not again."

"I knew it," said an embarrassed Konrad. "Dad did this all the time, too. I don't know why Mom stayed with him."

Roderich looked up. "Hey, Izaya, Shizuo, come join the party! The rest of you, go to bed."

"Hell no!" Izaya and Shizuo said at the same time. They and the kids retreated back upstairs to their rooms.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: <strong>Konrad is the name I gave to Kugelmugel.

Also, just picture Sakura Haruno, Mikuru Asahina, Haruhi Suzumiya, and Simca as grown-ups instead of teenagers.

For those who don't know:

Blair is from Soul Eater.

Sakura Haruno is from Naruto.

Mikuru Asahina and Haruhi Suzumiya are from The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya.

Simca is from Air Gear.

Nami and Nico Robin are from One Piece.

Mai Valentine is from Yu-Gi-Oh.

Viletta Nu is from Code Geass.


	7. Drunk Chris and the Custody Hearing

**Episode 4: Drunk Chris and the Austrian Custody Hearing**

A week went by, and everyone was pretty much settled in. Soul was getting better at the piano, which made Maka happy that her friend—and possible future boyfriend!—was happy. Kid helped out a lot with organizing the house, even though Roderich found it to be a tad annoying at times. Sonic and his buddies were getting better at keeping Chris from being a bully to Gilbert. Izaya talked Anri into showing Mikado and Masaomi her Saika powers, which they all then used to scare Chris every time he succeeded in making little Gilbo cry. Also, Izaya was helping Gilbert strengthen his awesomeness.

To be honest, Mikado and Masaomi were pretty shocked by Anri's powers at first. But, in a couple days, they got used to it.

* * *

><p>Finally, the day of Roderich and Elizabeta's custody hearing came, along with news of their plan to elope.<p>

"_What?" _Liesel, Konrad, and Ludwig asked in complete surprise. Their jaws dropped, and their eyes widened as they took in the news: Roderich Edelstein, actually settling on one woman? Wow.

"After what I saw, I'm actually surprised," Tails commented.

"I think it's sweet," Amy said in a giddy voice.

"Nobody's saying it's not sweet, Amy," Myung explained. "It's just that based on what we walked in on last week, it's hard to believe he actually settled on one woman."

"Personally, I'm surprised he's not going to marry all of them," said Sonic.

"I've come to realize that there are many girls out there, but there's only one Elizabeta," Roderich said dramatically. "And she's the one I want to marry."

Konrad leaned in close to the others. "He's telling the truth. I can tell. Trust me; I'm his brother."

"Okay, we'll take your word for it," said Mikado. "I mean, Masaomi was a bit of a ladies' man before he settled with Saki."

"Mikado!" an embarrassed Masaomi exclaimed, his face turning red.

"Masaomi, you were a pimp like Roddy?" Gilbert asked.

"Uh, yeah, but I'm not anymore, so let's not talk about it anymore," said Masaomi.

"Okay," Gilbert said.

* * *

><p>A couple hours later, Roderich, Elizabeta, and company were at the courthouse. Chris was playing with a paddle ball and smacking bubble gum, disturbing the bailiff and other people in the courtroom. The bailiff looked like he really, really wanted to sock Chris in the jaw. But he didn't, because he would've been in trouble, sadly.<p>

"Would you STOP IT?" Roderich yelled at Chris.

"Bailiff, he yelled at me!" Chris whined and pointed at Roderich.

"Good!" the bailiff said back. "I don't like you, kid."

"Tsubaki, this is torture!" Black*Star whispered. "Can I go get a snack?"

"Well, alright," said Tsubaki. Black*Star jumped up out of his seat and ran out of the courtroom to look for a vending machine.

* * *

><p>Later, the hearing was in session. The judge was reviewing Roderich's lifestyle and how his home life was, and whether or not this life was appropriate for the Beilschmidt sibs.<p>

"Now, Mr. Edelstein, I have a question for you," said the judge.

"What is it, Your Honor?" Roderich asked.

"According to your history, you've been known to have many girlfriends at one time," said the judge. "Is this still the case?"

"No, Your Honor," Roderich replied. "I now have only—"

"BOOOOOOOOOO!" Chris yelled.

The judge banged his gavel. "Silence in the courtroom!"

"As I was saying, before Chris Klondike so rudely interrupted me," Roderich said in a pissed-off voice. "I now have only one girlfriend. Her name is Elizabeta Hedervary. She and I were even planning on getting married in the future."

"BOOO! RODERICH, YOU SUCK!" Chris shouted again, making heads turn. Black*Star came into the courtroom at that instant, carrying a big bucket of popcorn from a movie theater nearby.

"GILBERT SUCKS, TOO!" Chris continued. "AND ALL OF AUSTRIA CAN KISS MY BUTT! YOU PEOPLE SUCK! BOOOOOOO! GO HOME, BOO!"

The judge banged his gavel again. "Quiet, or I'll have the bailiff remove you from the courtroom!"

But Chris didn't stop. "BOOOOO! GO HOME, BOO!"

"That's it!" said the judge. "Bailiff, get him out of here!" Chris cursed as the bailiff literally dragged him out of the courtroom by his pants.

"What's wrong with him?" Knuckles whispered to Izaya.

"Got me," Izaya whispered back.

"I guess he got into the Schnapps we had in the kitchen," Ludwig whispered.

"Oh," said Izaya. "That explains a lot."

"He's mean," Gilbert said. He was starting to tear up because of Chris, once again, hurting his feelings.

The judge then saw Black*Star munching on popcorn. "Hey, no food in the courtroom."

"But—" Black*Star said.

"Take your food outside," the judge ordered.

"Ah, dammit," Black*Star said. He picked up his popcorn, got up, and exited the courtroom. Unfortunately, he had to wait with Chris. Poor, poor Black*Star.

The judge turned to Elizabeta. "Miss Hedervary, why didn't you use your frying pan on the boy the bailiff had to drag out of here?"

"Because I wasn't allowed to bring it in," said Elizabeta. "If I had it, I would've hit the crap out of him."

"Oh, alright, you're off the hook," said the judge. "Now, back to this custody thing. Mr. Edelstein, based on your history, the fact that you're no longer going to be a pimp like your father, and your income, you are hereby granted custody of Liesel, Mudgig, and Gilbert Beilschmidt." He banged his gavel. "Court is adjourned."

Ludwig stood up. "With all due respect, Your Judgeness, my name's not Mudgig. It's Ludwig."

"Oh, sorry, your name's not that popular anymore," said the judge. "My mistake." Everybody rose as the judge left the bench and exited the courtroom.

"This is wonderful!" said Elizabeta.

"Let's go out tonight to celebrate," Roderich said.

"Yeah!" everybody else cheered.

"Can I bring Prussia?" Gilbert asked his cousin. He showed Roderich the bear he had brought with him to the hearing.

"Sure, why not?" Roderich replied.

* * *

><p>Roderich and Elizabeta treated everybody to a nice dinner at a family restaurant. Everybody except Chris got to have dessert because Chris behaved badly in court.<p>

* * *

><p>Later, when they got home, Izaya and everyone else explained what happened back in Ikebukuro to Roderich and Elizabeta, from the rest of the gang's arrival to Chris the idiot opening the Chest of Demons. They also explained that they had to travel around the world and capture the demons in order to keep them from destroying the world.<p>

Naturally, Roderich objected greatly to his cousins doing this. "No! I just got you three back. I can't bear the thought of losing you like I lost your parents!"

"But Roddy, Iza will keep us safe," said Gilbert. "Shizu-chan will, too."

"Please don't call me that," Shizuo said to Gilbert.

Roderich sighed. "We'll talk about this more tomorrow. Now we need to get ready for bed."

With that, everyone went to bed. Myung had to help Chris into the bathroom to throw up, and then his room.


	8. The Elder Wand of Hogwarts, Part I

**Episode 5: The Elder Wand of Hogwarts, Part I**

After much debate and convincing, Roderich finally agreed to let his cousins go with Sonic and the others to hunt the thirteen demons and trap them back in the Chest. Konrad wanted to go, too, but Roderich objected to that for an obvious reason.

"But why can't I go, bro?" Konrad asked in dismay.

"Because you're still grounded," Roderich firmly explained to his little brother. "You still need to think about your actions at school, young man."

"Aw, man!" Konrad whined, then pouted. _"Verdammt."_

"Konrad Frederick Edelstein, you watch your mouth!" Roderich scolded.

After a long-ass argument with Roderich, Konrad angrily marched up to his room and slammed the door.

* * *

><p>Meanwhile, Liesel was Skyping with a friend of hers from Brooklyn, New York, while most of the other guys were packing for the trip. She herself had just finished packing her stuff.<p>

"_Demon hunting?" _Liesel's friend, Jakob Cohen, asked with excitement.

"Yup," Liesel said with a grin.

"_Sounds dangerous," _Jakob commented. _"And fun, too! Hey, do you think you and the others will make a stop in Tel Aviv while on your adventures? I'm visiting my cousin Rebekah there right now."_

"Dunno," said Liesel. "I hope so; I'd like to see you soon."

"_Is Mudgig—Ludwig—whatever his name is still stupid?" _Jakob asked Liesel.

"Oh, yeah," Liesel replied and started laughing hard. "You know what he did in Ikebukuro to try and earn money? He kept on trying to pass junk off as antique artifacts and tried selling them! Pretty stupid, huh?"

Jakob laughed just as hard as Liesel. _"Yeah, pretty dumb."_

Both Liesel and Jakob continued laughing and making fun of Ludwig.

* * *

><p>Gilbert was done packing his Pikachu backpack. He saw Liesel on her laptop—which Izaya had bought her back in Ikebukuro—and, carrying Prussia, sidled up to her.<p>

"What'cha doin'?" Gilbert asked, looking over his big sister's shoulder.

"Just talking with my friend Jakob," said Liesel.

"Oh," Gilbert said. Then he got a closer look, saw Liesel's friend on the screen, and waved. "Hi, Jakob!"

Jakob smiled at Gilbert and waved back. _"Aw, hi, Gilbo."_

* * *

><p>Ludwig was finished packing his stuff as well. He saw Liesel on her laptop. Gilbert was next to her and waving at the screen. Lui went over to his sibs and saw what his sister was doing.<p>

"Oh, you're talking to that stupid American again?" Ludwig asked in annoyance; he always hated it when Liesel hit it off with boys who weren't German. He _especially _hated it when his big sister started taking an interest in American boys. He didn't have anything against Americans in general; he just found the American boys Liesel's age to be very annoying.

"American?" Gilbert asked in confusion. "I thought he was from Israel."

"Well, actually, Jakob's parents are from Israel, but he was born in New York," Liesel explained.

"_You think I'm stupid, Mudgig?" _an insulted Jakob asked. _"Why?"_

"It's because you American boys are all the same with your small brains, and your baggy pants that show your underwear, and your—" Ludwig rambled on, but was cut off by Jakob.

"_I find that racist!" _said Jakob. _"Besides, I don't have a small brain, and I don't wear pants that show my underwear!"_

"Uh…oh…um, uh…sorry about that…" Ludwig said in embarrassment. His face turned red, and he hid his head in his shirt.

"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!" Gilbert screamed when he saw Ludwig with his head in his shirt. "West's head is gone! WAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!" He started crying and held on tight to Prussia.

* * *

><p>Izaya, who was also finished packing, rushed up to Gilbert once he heard his cries. He picked Gilbert up and tried making him feel better.<p>

"It's alright, Little Prussia, it's alright," Izaya said. "I'm sure Lui's head will be right back."

"You don't think the Headless Horseman took it, do you?" Gilbert asked the guy who was teaching him to be awesome.

"Nah, why would the Headless Horseman take Lui's head?" Izaya said with a laugh. "Seriously, Lui isn't awesome. Not like yours truly."

Ludwig emerged from inside his shirt, insulted by what Izaya said about him. "HEY!"

"West, your head's back!" Gilbert said happily. "The Headless Horseman didn't take it!"

"See?" Izaya said. "I told you his head would be back, and it is."

"Guys, we're ready to go," Tails announced. "Shizuo got a car for us."

"Okay, come on, you three," said Izaya. He was still carrying Gilbert, who was now wearing his Pikachu backpack.

"Jakob, I've gotta go now," Liesel told her friend. "I'll talk to you when we get to wherever we are."

"_Okay, Liesel," _said Jakob. _"Talk to you soon. Bye."_

Both Liesel and Jakob signed off, and Liesel shut her laptop down. She put her backpack on her back, picked up her laptop, and followed Izaya and her brothers to the car.

Everyone loaded their stuff into a van that Shizuo had brought, and then they hit the road. They decided that their first stop should be England, because the Beilschmidt siblings mentioned that they had a friend in England who told them about a wizard school called Hogwarts. They thought that the place would be a good start to their search, because, according to the Beilschmidt sibs' friend, Arthur Kirkland, the school had a lot of powerful magical artifacts.

* * *

><p>Kid decided to call Lord Death to notify him about their first destination, and, just their luck, Lord Death had some information for them.<p>

"You're in luck, everyone," said the symmetry freak's father. "Hogwarts is exactly where you'll find one of the thirteen demons."

"Is he symmetrical?" Kid asked.

"Who cares about that?" Liz yelled.

"Yeah, Kid," said Patty. "We have to stop this demon, silly!"

"What's this particular demon like?" Izaya asked.

"Is he scary?" Gilbert asked, clinging to Ludwig.

"He might be, Gilbo," Lord Death replied. "Anyway, his name is Naraku. Normally, he wears a white cloak, complete with the mask of a baboon. According to some information I got from Arthur, he recently attacked Hogwarts. The entire school had to be evacuated. The teachers, students, and other staff will not be there."

"That doesn't explain what he's doing in Hogwarts," said Anri.

"He's at Hogwarts because he seeks the Elder Wand," said Lord Death.

"What's the Elder Wand?" Tails asked.

"It's a legendary wand made over a hundred years ago," Lord Death explained. "Legend says that it's the most powerful wand in the world. If Naraku gets his hands on that wand, the results would be disastrous!"

"So, what do we do? Retrieve the wand and stuff Naraku in the Chest?" asked a bored Chris. He yawned rather loudly, which irked everyone, even Lord Death.

"Uh, actually, you do have to get Naraku into the Chest, however you can," said Lord Death. "But you must leave the Elder Wand at Hogwarts."

"What?" Chris whined. "We don't get to keep it?"

"That's right, Chris Whiney Dork," said Lord Death. "It's not only powerful, it's also very dangerous."

"Say, Lord Death, are we going to get some assistance for this?" asked Sonic. "'Cause this sounds like a tough job."

"Well, I did send Miroku and Keiko's cousins there earlier, but I haven't heard back from them in a while," said Lord Death. "I also sent Celty ahead to meet you, so she'll be able to assist you."

"That's great!" Mikado exclaimed. "We're gonna see Celty again!"

"Oh, and one more thing," Lord Death said. "The next time you call, you might hear me screaming in the background."

"Why?" asked a puzzled Knuckles.

"Because Miroku and Keiko didn't know I sent their cousins Yoshimori and Tokine," said Lord Death. "When they find out, they're gonna kill me, I just know it!"

"Oh," everyone said in scared voices.

"Well…goodbye," Lord Death said. Then he signed off, leaving Chris and the others to their journey to England.

"Uh, let's keep going," Shizuo said, trying to forget about what Lord Death had just said about Miroku and Keiko unleashing their wrath upon him.

"Right," Myung agreed.

"England, here we come!" said an excited Masaomi.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: <strong>_Verdammt- _Damn (German)

P.S.: For anyone who doesn't know, Tel Aviv is in Israel.

P.P.S.: Jakob's cousin Rebekah is my Israel OC, Rebekah Novak.


End file.
